I find it rather sad that at the age of 46 I found out I had Cerebral Palsy. It also wasn’t a freak of nature that caused my injury. It wasn’t a mistake by a midwife either, but a mistake by the doctor looking after my mum, leaving her to go for too long and her getting into distress, after my twin was born.
Would my life be any different now without Cerebral Palsy? I’m not sure I can answer that question because that wasn’t my life. I seem to go through phases where I’m grieving for the loss of something that wasn’t afforded to me, as a consequence of something that’s happened. I am tied to my condition.
And although I was born with physical and emotional issues and it’s something I’ve had to come to terms with, not being able to share my thoughts with my family has been my biggest loss.
There are questions I may never have the answers for. I fear the only answers I will have are those I answer for myself in my head.