Time for change

I wish I’d got to this stage in my life with more control over the decisions I wanted to make, but had no choice. It’s only when someone close to us moves away that we bring into question what we’ve accomplished, up to that point.

In just under three weeks life will change again, as University approaches second time around. As a family we missed out on those early years doing things together, the way we wanted to do them and the sad reality is that we don’t have the opportunity to change things now.

As a parent I know how important it is to allow children to make their own decisions. Our decisions and opportunities only came about when my father passed, earlier this year.


22 Aug, 2013

4 thoughts on “Time for change

  1. There is a lot I would do different regarding my daughter and the early years with her. I did have a great influence over her until she was 9 years old and her father died, that’s when my mother took my place.

    Sarah would go to her because she would do whatever Sarah wanted, or give her what ever she wanted and it still is going on to a certain extent. We can’t go back but we can’t sit around and think what if all day long.

    We have to do what is right now and for the future. My daughter has to learn to live her life on her own and learn. I can give advice but I can’t make her take it.

    I also can’t change the way I was brought up. I didn’t have much control of my life growing up. My parents were over protective of me. I wanted to work and earn my own way but they wouldn’t let me til I was in college.

    1. Children tend to go to those who make the most fuss of or as you way will give what she wants. It’s easy to look back in any which way, but we cannot change the past, all we can do is look to the future and change the way we do and accept things

      Not everyone will have the ability to do that. Some will want to do that but may not know how, or some just won’t want to.

      Hopefully things will change for you when your mother is no longer in your lives. It’s not easy someone else being in control, but I know you’ll work on changing that when you feel the time is right.

      For myself there is nothing for me to change. I can only move forward from here and that is what I intend to do.

  2. Yes I can definitely understand how you feel, since I also grew up in a world where I always felt powerless to make any changes in my life! The idea that we weren’t supposed to do anything for ourselves was strictly enforced.

    I believe the alternative would be to be treated even more like we were invisible to break our spirits! Only now with my mother passed away and my father in his remaining days, do I finally feel like it’s OK to do what I need to do for myself.

    I’m trying my best to be a better father, son and boyfriend among so many other things!

    1. Thanks Randy. Yes I am sure we both know how that feels. As long as you do your best that’s all that matters.

      It’s not always easy on the back of what we have known, but just trying and others seeing you’re trying is enough.

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