Two of a kind

It’s never easy being a twin, unless twins are treated as individuals. Neither of us faired any better, or were treated any differently. We attended the same school, were in the same class and had the same friends.

Being one of a twin and being born second, meant that I would always lean towards my twin. With twin scenarios, it’s usual to have one twin that leads and couple that with the fact that I had Cerebral Palsy meant that as a child I would have more to deal with and would eventually go on to struggle with both.

It’s also always harder on the conforming twin, particularly if their parents aren’t treating them as individuals. Being a parent I know only too well how the parenting thing works. I treat both my children as individuals, make decisions based on their behaviour with me and with each other.

As individuals, we’re responsible for what we put out there. It’s up to children not stand in judgment or blame the other when she or he is clearly at fault. Anyone being blamed for another siblings’ behaviour isn’t fair and being in the middle is always the hardest place to be.

13 Nov, 2012

2 thoughts on “Two of a kind

  1. I wsn’t a twin but my mom is and she lives with her twin and her husband. I think they were treated as equal. They sang a lot together and were known around here as the Brown Twins. They sound beautiful together.

    I have a younger sister that in all actuality should have been the first born because that’s the way she was raised. I was treated with kid gloves most of my life and felt inferior to my sister.

    I raised my two girls as different individuals because they are like night and day. At first I would dress them alike on holidays then got out of that habit and let them choose how they wanted to dress. They are still very different, but the same in ways.

    1. I’m not sure how or why parents choose to parent the way they do, but it sounds as though your mom’s upbringing was completely different to yours. It’s lovely to see twins get on.

      I have always believed that our world and our personalities are shaped around parenting and the environment. Of course other experiences, either positive or negative ones will also play a part too in the way we see the world and ourselves.

      My twin and I were always being dressed alike too, but would have preferred to have dressed individually. It’s great that you gave your daughters a choice.

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