Unintentional hurt

The most common problems in any relationship is being emotionally wounded by those who unintentionally hurt us by their comments that sometimes seem intentional.

Most relationships when complacency sets in can harbour unintentional hurt, such as bringing up issues from the past that aren’t relevant to what’s going on at that time, but we tend to go back to what we know, to what we’ve lived.

Our emotional baggage is usually the reason why we may unintentionally hurt someone. However, if we make ourselves consciously aware of issues in our past, we will give ourselves the opportunity to work through and change how we relate to those we choose to be around.

Changing our attitude, if we are presented with these kind of problems, will always allow us to deal with people and our issues better so that none of this becomes intentional. I don’t believe it ever is. Our unconscious makes it so.

18 Jul, 2012

2 thoughts on “Unintentional hurt

  1. I’ve had people do this to me, especially my mother believe it or not.

    My mother isn’t an awful person but I wasn’t her favorite and I really don’t think she new she was doing this to me. I felt horrible at the time and just thought she hated me, but I was a young teenager and misunderstood everything that was said to me.

    I try to be nice and if I ever say things like that to someone, I’m not intentionally doing it and I really don’t until much later that I do these things, then when I think about it, I get all upset because I did it and didn’t realise I had.

    1. I think that until we make a conscious connection we probably won’t know we are doing it as you say. It’s only when we replay the outcome in our heads that we know we have.

      I think like your mother I lot of us will behave in the same way. It’s just a shame she doesn’t realise how she behaves with you. I know you know she isn’t an awful person, but just think how much better your relationship would be if she didn’t behave in this way and how much better you would feel about her.

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