Wasted opportunities

Not being upset that a parent isn’t in our life, doesn’t make us bad people. It highlights things for us that should have been changed that weren’t, when that parent was this side of life. It just allows us to distance our feelings.

In my own case, whilst dealing with his terminal illness, I never imagined what life would be like without him, although I know I finally felt relieved when he passed. If nothing else had been addressed, my physical problems should have been.

Whilst talking to my father a few days before he passed, I began to realise what my life with him had really been about and realised then that his life had only ever been about putting himself first. Perhaps subconsciously I had been living in the hope that one day his life would have emotionally been about his children.

It would be now too late to put that right and realistically knowing that he never would have changed this side of life, had he lived.

1 Sep, 2013

4 thoughts on “Wasted opportunities

  1. You’re right, you’re not a bad person for not being upset about your father’s death.

    It was wrong of your parents not to do anything about your condition while you were growing up and not giving you information wasn’t right. When people become parents it should be about the child not themselves.

    We are blessed with another life and we’re supposed to care for that life no matter what.

    1. I totally agree with you Lisa. As parents’ it is our duty to put our children first with everything, no matter what.

      I think not having the emotional support has made me more aware of what I know is right, so it’s easier to change for our own family, but unfortunately that doesn’t change the original problem.

  2. It’s okay to feel the way you do. You are being honest and that is only a good thing.

    I agree not having the appropriate emotional support as a child has also shown you how not to do it and if you can find something positive from your experiences that is to be applauded.

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