When children are ignored

I grew up in an era where children were ‘seen and not heard.’ Whatever squabbles or aggrievances I had, I was told ‘we were as bad as each other.’ There was no mediation, so my protests went unheard.

It was at a time when parents didn’t seem to care whether their issues became their children’s. But whatever stress our parents are under, their stress shouldn’t be ours. It is important children have their emotional needs met so that they can grow into well-balanced adults.

Although my hospital visits were met, none of my other needs were met. Now when I look back, I still can’t believe this was my life. But no matter what parents deals with, it’s important they deal with their issues, change how they perceive those, so they can continue to build on their relationship with their children.

As parents we must try to be the best parents we can be, so that our children can be the best that they can be when they become parents with their own children. The era we are born into shouldn’t come into it.


15 Mar, 2019

2 thoughts on “When children are ignored

  1. I was ignored as a child, with a sibling both older and younger that my parents concentrated their attentions on.

    Thankfully, that meant I was able to grow and develop through my own experiences without any negative parental influences. I met my own needs.

    I consider myself lucky, but I did have developmental issues which were ignored and that should never be allowed to play out, as it means a child’s basic needs are not being met.

    As you have shown, those needs will resurface in later life as bigger, more complicated issues with more serious manifestations.

    1. ‘I met my own needs.’ Yes, it’s good that you were self-sufficient that you were capable and able to help yourself.

      No child should have to deal with neglect. Looking back, you’ve said your parents did you a favour, because you were able to shape your life in the way you wanted your life to go.

      With my disability issues and through ‘helicopter parenting’ I struggled with the control. Leaving home didn’t change everything initially.

      It’s easy to live the life as a consequence of something. Childhood has everything to do with that.

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