10 thoughts on “Responding to anger

  1. This is a very hard one for me, since I get triggered if someone is in my face acting very angry! I can really pick up on people’s feelings, which isn’t always a good thing. I try not to react, but it doesn’t always work out so well.

    It has taken a very long time to be able to walk away when that happens. I’m just thankful that I can do that now!

    1. I’m pleased that you choose to walk away. The quote is so true… responding to someone who is angry will just create more anger. It’s just not worth it in the longer term.

      We don’t have to go out of our way to prove or convince someone of what we already know, or for them to convince us.

  2. I usually just walk away, or calmly say something back that will not add to the anger. The person that is angry is just trying to get you upset as well.

    1. Angry people tend to lash out regardless, it’s as if they’re trying to get back at us in some way. Walking away is definitely the best option. You’re right Lisa.

  3. I have never been fired up by other people’s anger.

    I am fortunate that in my job I am often questioned by ‘smart’ lawyers and I have to keep cool. The worst thing I could do is to get wound up and treat them they way they treat me and I use that approach in my personal life too.

    When you are angry things get said and get said in a way that you often wished they hadn’t and it can be difficult to undo that sort of damage.

    I agree with Lisa it can often add to the other person’s anger too. Better bet is to keep your cool or try and diffuse the situation.

    1. I agree with both you and Lisa. Diffusing an argument is usually the best way to avoid anger and anger issues, particularly if the anger is with someone else and they try to make it your problem.

  4. One of my few faults is to do this. It just makes things worse and it can escalate further into a verbal fight, which is not pleasant. Never productive to do this.

    Take a deep breath and think before you speak. I have learned this through years of dealing with this situation. Try to stay calm and reasonable.

    1. I don’t think you’re unique Randy, we’ve probably all done it! But I agree taking a deep breath and thinking before we speak will help.

      We just have to remember to do it. That’s always the challenge.

  5. This is one thing I need to work on. If I feel threatened I tend to lash out (not really caring if the other person gets even madder in the process.)

    I think I will take the advice that someone else stated, say something calmly and walk away (giving them time to cool down). So hard to do when you are a Latina, we have short fuses!

    1. I’m never sure if we feel threatened because we’ve walked into a problem without weighing the situation up beforehand, or someone else is using threatening behaviour, so we feel threatened.

      Either way, it’s always a good idea to say something calmly and walk away. It usually makes the other person more mad as they cannot argue with themselves! I agree.

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