Acceptance of choices

How many of us struggle because we fail to make decisions, or we rely on other people’s judgment? It would be good if we could make, even accept our own choices.

Once we learn how to make choices, we’re likely to respond in appropriate ways so that we initially get to make our choices. It’s a confidence thing, but as adults we should be making our own choices and when we do, we need to be happy with the choices we make.

Judgments are made based on our choices, but our judgments can sometimes interfere with what then becomes our reality, usually because the choices we’ve made aren’t choices we’re happy with. We need to be accepting of both our choices and judgments. It’s fine to accept other people’s choices, so long as their choices comply with our wants and needs.

Possible outcome of choices

When we’re in a position where we don’t accept our own choices, or cannot decide, we will fail to make any decisions. We should always look at the possible outcome on the choices we need to make. That way we’ll broaden our thinking to include all the negative possibilities as well.

Once we’ve taken everything into consideration and ruled things out, we’re more likely to find direction and clarity, which will enable us to start making our own choices. I believe that when we’re not happy with the choices we’ve made, we’re more likely to want to change those choices.

I also believe that making a choice on what we’re not interested in or don’t want, is often easier than making a choice on what we do want. We tend to worry about making the right choice, so we put off making a final decision on our choice, but if we’re looking to make a choice and we’re thinking about it, then that is the right choice.

Either way, we must take away the stress, eliminate what we think can’t work having weighed up the pros and cons and allow ourselves to finally make a choice.

3 Aug, 2011

12 thoughts on “Acceptance of choices

  1. This is very appropriate timing, as I need to learn to be able to live with the choices I make.

    Thanks for sharing this post, it is a very good one!

  2. You make me realize I did make choices, even at the age I was. And I continue to choose how I view and deal with things, especially the memories.

    1. Jason I’m not sure at your age you will have made consenting choices.

      I do agree with you that now as the adult you will be able to choose how you view and deal with things, pertaining to your childhood memories. Time to re-write your own book.

  3. I love this particular topic also. I believe that I struggle with making my own choices due to self doubt I may experience during times I struggle with feeling sad; but when I’m feeling good I find that I have little experience in making my own choices and it’s almost natural to ask others to help in making choices.

    In this way, I avoid having to rely on myself, which I fear, making my own choices. I know that I need to learn to rely and trust myself more. I need to accept the choices that I make. I like your advice on it’s most likely easier to make choices based on what we don’t want rather than what we do.

    I will use that knowledge and hold on to it in the future to help guide me to make choices easier! Thanks Ilana! 🙂

    1. I used to do exactly what you do Katie. My choices weren’t my choices, my choices were based on what other people wanted and expected me to do; partly because I had no self-confidence or self-esteem and partly because I was expected to live my life like that.

      I think that once you learn to take control and you learn that it’s okay to make your own choices, you will start. The first time is hard, but just remember the choice you make will be right for you, because it’s your choice.

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