Apologise or walk away?

17 Oct 2016

It’s sad how when push comes to shove, people choose to walk away from relationships, rather than offer an apology if they’ve done wrong and put things right.

It takes us more effort to walk away, than it does to apologise. No one is infallible. Perhaps we need to centre our ego on what’s right, so that our integrity stays intact, rather than let people think ill of us, because we choose to walk away.

To apologise isn’t weakness, it’s strength of character, a determination for us to right a wrong. A successful apology requires empathy and strength to admit failure, fault and weakness. Non-apologies are ego-driven, the ego gets bruised and we still fail to apologise.

Perhaps there are two reasons why we should at least think about an apology. Saying sorry allows us to salvage, or restore a relationship that we clearly once cared about. To walk away for the sake of an ego, means the ego has won and we have no say. Walking away also brings its own challenges with a new situation that often takes us out of our comfort zone.

Not apologizing doesn’t change what the universe knows to be true, even if we choose not to admit it. These things never go away, until we bring about the right conclusion. Whether we’re accountable now or not, if the reason we’re walking away is down to us and the subconscious mind takes a different view to our conscious, at some point we will still be accountable.

Unfortunately, and so it goes that whilst we’ve decided to walk away and we’re not making ourselves accountable, in the process we will also have lost, what was a very good friend.

2 Responses to “Apologise or walk away?”

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  1. Tim 17. Oct, 2016 at 8:39 pm #

    Sometimes that pebble in my mouth is my tongue, when I can’t bring myself to apologize to someone who hurt me. I guess it’s the swollen bruise to my ego and to the gentle person that I am.

    But you’re right, an apology is the best way to help ease the strain, instead of carrying that stone in my stomach.

    • Ilana 17. Oct, 2016 at 8:49 pm #

      Thanks Tim. It’s the person who hurts us who should do the apologising, but where that doesn’t happen we have to be able to deal with the situation ourselves.

      I tend to go in and explain why I’m hurt in the hope the apology is forthcoming. An apology is always the best way to help ease the strain on both side. It’s a shame people don’t quite get that particularly where the ego is involved.

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