Being insensitive

No matter what we say, other people’s reactions to us somehow don’t seem warranted. They either make us feel inferior, belittle us, are over critical, or can seem cold and aloof.

They’re insensitive. How an insensitive person communicates with others is how they communicate with themselves. When we have something that we deal, we’re also less likely to be sensitive to other people’s wants and needs.

Society as a whole has become more critical and insensitive to other people. We tend to think too little about others. It’s not that we don’t care about others, we unconsciously care about ourselves more.

Although it’s not always easy to understand why people are insensitive, one reason could be that their own opinions and needs are so significant that they fail to see other people’s needs.

A lot of how we behave comes from our own sense of self. In our formative years, if we grow up to look out for other people, we will become sensitive to those people’s needs. We need to be. There’s just too little of it.

Even if we haven’t experienced what other people experience, we can still know and understand how that person feels. It’s all about empathy. Being insensitive comes from a lack of understanding, fear and ignorance, but there is no excuse. We must come to understand.

Insensitive people will often show no feeling or concern for others. They are the ones who sadly need the love and concern. Sadly, anyone who is insensitive will always come across as inconsiderate, uncaring and unsympathetic.

Those attributes will be the catalyst for how they conduct themselves in their relationships too, as well as in their lives.


21 Jun, 2016

6 thoughts on “Being insensitive

  1. I grew up in a very insensitive world, so it used to be a struggle for me to have any compassion or concern for other people. I was forced to take care of my parents as a child while I wasn’t very well taken care of so; I eventually grew to hate being nice to anybody.

    I was a very cruel and sadistic child, which was actually encouraged by my mother as a way to make my father suffer. They were about as insensitive as you could get towards each other and even their own children, so it’s no wonder we all became so screwed up. My siblings were able to escape the moment they were old enough, while I got left behind during the worst of it!

    Needless to say, it’s kind of hard to function in the world when you don’t care about others, let alone yourself. One of my favorite expressions used to be, ‘I would feel for you, but I can’t reach,’ which is pretty much how I lived my life.

    The worst of it was when I tried being in the Army and that is one place where you really do need to care about yourself and others. I had pretty much lost the ability to connect with other human beings, so it did not end well.

    My mental health issues quickly surfaced and they didn’t comprehend how messed up I truly was. I could never be the killing machine they wanted me to be since I had worked so hard to cut myself off from that part of my personality.

    People are definitely losing the ability to communicate with each other in the normal ways. They walk around being more concerned about getting the newest phone or being able to drive their outrageously expensive Cadillac, than they are helping out their fellow man.

    I see this every day and wonder if mankind is truly worth saving after all. We send our troops to places where the people are beyond insensitive to their own people, to supposedly help them win their freedom and it turns out they don’t want our help.

    Maybe it’s time to actually forget about these people and focus more on the people in our country who actually do want our help!

    1. Thanks Randy. Yes, quite. Whilst there is merit in your comment about people being insensitive to their own people; it’s difficult to stand by and watch people struggle. They are the real victims in all of this. It’s charitable to want to help.

      As the saying goes, ‘charity begins at home’ and that’s right; but if it’s not happening, we realistically can’t just stand back and watch.

  2. I agree Ilana. Perhaps we need to find a way to rescue our humanity from technology. We know that kindness and mercy have been replaced by devices.

    You can clearly see that something awful is driving a wedge between us and our civility.

    1. Thanks Tim. Yes, most of what we learn stems from what we see with our families. I believe our childhood has a lot to do with how we respond and behave in the adult world. There is certainly an element of truth in what you say.

      In a blog I’m working on at the moment, I am exploring the modern world in more detail and whether technology is solely responsible for our lack of humanity and kindness.

      Things are never that straightforward. There are always other factors we must take into consideration.

  3. We do certainly seem to have lost our way as a race and civility and sensitivity seem rare qualities in our daily lives.

    It doesn’t have to be like this if we cared enough to make the change.

    1. Your last paragraph sums up your response nicely.

      Thank you. Yes I couldn’t agree more. I believe it needs to happen if we are to change human behaviour for the better.

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