Boosting self-esteem

Like low self-esteem there are many facets to self-esteem. As children, our brains are like sponges, absorbing as much information as we can.

The messages we get eventually turn into self-statements. Our beliefs, attitudes and thoughts become ingrained and become part of us that aren’t always accurate but are accepted by us as true facts.

The reactions particularly from our parents shape our sense of self-worth. Any negative reactions we have will become stumbling blocks and that creates low self-esteem. But there are things we can do to help boost low self-esteem below:

Accept a compliment

It’s hard to accept a compliment when you’ve never been paid one. Compliments must be felt. They’re not simply words. Instead of dismissing a compliment from someone, accept and acknowledge to yourself the fact that wanted to pay you that compliment.

Avoid labels

This is very much a common problem for a lot of people. But try to avoid pulling yourself down by saying things like ‘you’re stupid, lazy, can’t, should and never’ and instead introduce words that renew your confidence like ‘can, shall and I will.’

Make self-esteem unconditional

Change your inner voice and embrace yourself unconditionally by facilitating a more compassionate attitude towards yourself. Take away thoughts like ‘I’ll like myself better when’ and replace it with thoughts like, ‘I like myself now.’

Write your thoughts down on paper

What we write down can become a self-help tool and is the first step to noting our internal dialogue; our internal dialogue can always be changed. The changes we incorporate into our life should be small, but significant ones that happen over a period of time.

There will be lots of days where we feel we’re not achieving anything, but each significant step means we become mentally stronger and is a day nearer to our goal.

Try not to torment yourself over the things you feel you’ve failed at. A parting thought on this particular topic… perhaps it’s not that you’ve failed, perhaps those things were never meant for you.

10 Sep, 2010

9 thoughts on “Boosting self-esteem

  1. Yeah, my self-esteem used to be pretty bad. I would get the “you can’t do that,” thing from my mother and I was lower than my sister. Plus I would get picked on in school by different kids, so I’ve always had low self-esteem. I think my being in dance school and several other things when I was a teen helped out a little, but mostly when I became a nurse helped me mostly, I had purpose and that was to help others.

    1. Absolutely Lisa, but although you are helping others, you still need to work on your self-esteem, because away from your job you have to be able to live with ‘you’ and that is always hard if you’re not feeling it.

  2. I find if I avoid any type of labeling or statement of limitations from others, it allows me to define myself thereby boosting my self esteem

    1. Brian you are absolutely right because you allow yourself to pull free of what other people think about you. That will as you correctly say allow you to define who you are, which in effect will boost your self-esteem.

  3. So glad that you are boosting your self-esteem. I try and do this every once in a while when I get a compliment and keep it at the forefront of my mind. A pick me up for a gloomy day or when I am feeling sad.

    1. Me too Maria… so glad you try to boost your self-esteem. Not always easy to do when life hands out so much. Glad we touched base today – loved it.

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