“In truth a family is what you make it. It is made strong, not by the number of heads counted at the dinner table, but by the rituals you help family members create, by the memories you share, by the commitment of time, caring, and love you show to one another, and by the hopes for the future you have as individuals and as a unit.” – Marge Kennedy
Yes, if we were to think about our relationships with family, we may see how certain elements of this quote are true. The saying, ‘friends are the family you choose’ is how people view their friends, more than they view family.
When looking at another person’s family we may compare their family to our own. But not all families get it wrong, there are families who get the family thing right. They are supportive, non-opinionated, they are a team player.
By creating strong ‘family rituals’ ones that create independent, happy and moralistic children, you pave the way for them to create the same in their own relationships and with their own families. A legacy.
Where it is clearly families don’t get along, it is important to let go. The care, love and commitment of a family need to be balanced for ‘family to work.’
That said, we can all create strong family rituals that work, by dealing with issues and changing family patterns that have been passed down through the generations.