Cutting ties/2

As individuals we work relationships differently. Some of us may be happy to cut ties, others may be afraid to cut ties for fear of reprisal.

The following may go some way to avoiding stress associated with relationships, with or without cutting ties:

  • Make less contact through emails, visits or calls. Putting space between you, will allow you make clear minded decisions on how that other person has been affecting you;
  • Put your boundaries in place. If you feel cutting ties would be too drastic, one or two conciliatory ultimatums are fine. They make a point;
  • Always keep conversations neutral. If you know certain subjects are trigger points, avoid them and try to keep anything you do talk about neutral;
  • Cutting ties is like a bereavement, but without the closure. Anything that reminds you of lost contact will be difficult, but expecting difficulties emotionally will help prepare you;
  • Having a good support system in place always helps, should you decide to cut ties.

It is never an easy decision to cut ties and for some that would usually be a last resort, if at all.  There’s a saying that says: ‘it’s better to come from a broken home than to live in one.’ Relationships whether you live at home or not, tend to work the same way.

If the relationship isn’t working it’s, time to rethink. Apprehension and fear both play their part in our decisions to stay, but once we take the first step. Fast forward, things normally work out.

Of course, all circumstances are different, with different choices that need to be made.

12 Dec, 2010

8 thoughts on “Cutting ties/2

  1. I have decided that the only way to cut these toxic relationships is to act “as if” my daughters have passed away and mourn them. Only then am I completely able to move on with the business of having a happy and healthy life. I believe I have gotten past the mourning at this time and life is getting so much better. I wish I had done this sooner, but am very happy to be where I am today emotionally.

    1. I think that whatever works for you Brian, you must go with. I understand why you have chosen to do it this way. Emotionally telling yourself your daughters have passed will help you bring closure because in effect you will know that you cannot go back.

  2. I really liked the support aspect of this. I feel it is important when making a lot of decisions but especially ones about relationships, whether that be creating a new one or getting rid of another.

    1. LeAnna you are absolutely right. Support is the backbone to everything we do and everything we go on to achieve in our lives..

  3. Very good points. I think the most important thing is to have a solid support system in place.That will go a long way in helping one cope.

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