We spend our lives having to put things right with difficult people, making good and adapting, because we feel we have little choice.
And difficult people will usually draw themselves to people who they know they can manipulate, because those people will always aim to please. I am sure all of us at some point will have had at least one person in their lives, who emulates this behaviour. They will always have us bending over backwards in endless attempts to please them.
Difficult people will continue to live their lives projecting their feelings on to us, as if their feelings are ours and on our part after a while, we’ll start believing it’s us with the problem. They will project their anger on to us, fail to take responsibility and will continue to pass the buck.
They will try to project their feelings on to us, primarily because we’re too afraid to walk away for fear of being left on our own and because we let them. On our part, because we’re always having to put things right, we will continue to defend and justify ourselves, because it’s what we’ve known and what we’ve always done.
Perhaps, therefore we need to be clear what belongs to us and what clearly belongs to them. We mustn’t let difficult people think we need to justify ourselves, or own what clearly doesn’t belong to us. We’re not responsible for what other people have to deal with or how they’re made to feel.
Finally, we should stop trying to please them, walk away, or if we can’t walk away come back when the mood has shifted.