Emotions & expression

We all have different ways of coping and dealing with our emotions, conditioned through cultural experiences and our upbringing, which both play a pivotal part.

For example, those who live in Mediterranean countries express themselves openly over losing a loved one, whereas those from Northern European countries, may be encouraged or expected to grieve by themselves; away from the public gaze so as not to offend or cause others to feel uncomfortable.

But all emotions, negative and positive expressions must play their part in today’s world. They must be expressed, because not to expression our emotions will not only bring disharmony into the equation, but illness also. We must.

It is the most natural thing in the world to feel anger, to feel anxious, to feel sadness, in the same way it is to feel joy, excitement and contentment. Like getting dressed, learning to express should be natural, but it isn’t. We learn to shut off. That it’s wrong to express how we feel.

But the way we view the world has implications for our health. Research has shown that those of us who hold on to problems, who withdraw, who blame themselves and carrying guilt, who very rarely cry or get angry, may be more prone to “immune-related disorders.”

Blaming others, doesn’t deal with the root cause of why we feel anger and can start to compromise our health in the longer term. For us to stay well, we must take and be in control of our emotions and learn to stay in control of them.


11 Sep, 2010

10 thoughts on “Emotions & expression

  1. I can be a very emotional person. I was thinking of my mom this morning and shed a few tears for her. I believe crying is very good for us and is nothing to be ashamed of.

    It’s a natural stress reliever and you usually helps with feeling better after a good cry. I agree with everything you’ve posted today.

  2. In my own experience emotions do have to be expressed. When my mother died I felt I had to be strong for my father.

    I put off my grief and it has caused me greatly down the line. At the six month mark after her death my father & I got into a huge fight.

    I left and when I returned we were both able to finally start to heal and deal with our loss.

    1. I’m glad that you were able to go back in and sort out your problems relating to your mother’s death with your father. We all deal with death differently. What works for one person, doesn’t necessarily work for another.

      I think that sometimes we feel we have to be strong, but that is generally not how we have to be. Just being ourselves should be enough.

  3. Foe so many years I tried to mask and avoid any emotion through the use of alcohol and drugs and today I experience the full range of emotion and have learned the tools to channel them properly.

    It has led to a wonderfully fulfilling life and I don’t think I would have ever even dreamed that life could feel this way.

    Sure I’ve had some fairly major hardships in this journey but without the down there would be no reference point to go up.

  4. You are so right about the harmony thing. People who hold in their feelings tend to get immune related disorders.

    That is why I try to let out my feelings as much as possible. I used to hold them back and then I got cancer. So now I just tend to say what is on my mind, sometimes to my detriment.

    Thank you for putting this out there, it will help a lot of other people.

    1. Thank you for your support Maria. It’s friends like you that help me get this information out.

      Don’t worry about speaking out even if it is to your detriment. We cannot please everyone all of the time, but we need to please ourselves as it’s our life and we have to live it as we deem fit, not for someone else!

  5. I agree completely with what you have said. A strong mindset also helps mood as well.

    How you approach a particular situation is often related back to your mood during that time. I believe that the two are definitely interconnected.

    For me though managing emotions is often difficult.

    1. LeAnna I think your last point is the most poignant given what you deal with and what you’ve been through.

      This is why support is so important, because with support in place it’s always easier to manage those often difficult emotions.

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