Find yourself

Do you know what it really means to find yourself? To discover yourself in a world that is changed for good. In life it is the most important thing we will do.

As we continue our journey, not really knowing ourselves; we may also continue to listen to the inner critic that gives you all the wrong ideas about yourself.

We need to like ourselves without the ego. But finding ‘us’ is an unselfish process that must be at the heart of everything we do. For us to add value to our lives, we have to first know who we are and what our values are. We must understand our past, know our story and be at peace with ourselves.

We must continue to evolve and uncover our unique stories and be okay with those. We must recognise who we want to be, and passionately set to fulfilling our goals. Learn to identify and be okay with your experiences, be open and vulnerable and understand what makes you, you.

Whether our experiences are good or bad, those are our experiences and cannot be changed. Instead we must learn to embrace them. Learning about yourself isn’t something to be feared or avoided and berating yourself for your mistakes is pointless because that will just serve to hold you back even further.

Make sense of your past and be open to your experiences. Try to understand why they were meant for you. It’s a personal journey we will all benefit from taking. The better our ‘coherent narrative’ the more we will make mindful conscious choices in our present, that will represent our true self.


26 Jul, 2020

8 thoughts on “Find yourself

  1. If we don’t know who we are then how can we find the path to move forward? We have to find out who we are and what we value and that takes courage and action.

    It sounds self-centred but it is an unselfish process which goes to the heart of everything we do.

    1. Thanks. Yes, it is completely the opposite of selfish. Finding yourself helps you stay in the moment and move on from your past. It makes you happier and that makes other people happier too.

      Let’s be honest, we’re not. We’re not really living, the majority of us exist.

  2. No, it’s not something I’m familiar with. I was well trained and brainwashed into being such a people pleaser by my mother that I haven’t really known anything different.

    I wasted most of my life trying to make other people happy, when I kept choosing people just like my mother, who weren’t happy no matter what I did.

    It has been a long time since I have considered what I wanted from life, but once I started doing it last year, my life has changed and improved.

    I may have to be a confirmed bachelor for the rest of my life to do everything that I want to do, but I am hoping that it won’t come to that, but we shall have to see.

    1. Thanks Randy. With the right person Randy, there will be no need for you to be a confirmed bachelor.

      The good think about being human is that we can evolve and change, and can often ‘find’ ourselves through the process. We can also mentally and emotionally move on, we don’t have to stay where we were.

      I am pleased your life has changed and improved and hope it continues to go that way. I’m routing for you.

  3. I learn more about myself with every season, which means I’m a stranger to myself over and over again. With each change I revert to a style of life that’s foreign to me, one fresh reality after another.

    It’s a challenging way to find yourself, but there’s a message of some kind lurking everywhere. I’m sure something or someone is watching my progress.

    Ilana,

    1. Thanks Tim. Yes, depending on our early years, we will either know everything we need to know about ourselves, or we won’t know anything.

      But what happened to you Tim isn’t unique. I feel there are many of us out there, who know very little about ourselves.

      Unless you follow the spiritual practices I talk about through my writing, there is a lot we won’t know about ourselves and everything we need to learn about ourselves. But as with all spiritual practices, it is important we walk the walk.

      Through a disability I didn’t know I had, there was nothing I knew about myself, but through my blog, and my book, I now know everything I need to know about myself.

      In spirit our loved ones are 7 times more spiritual than they were this side of life. As you go about your life, you are being watched, by your loved ones. They know everything about you.

      As firm friends Tim, I would want to make sure you’re happy and coping okay, particularly in these difficult times. We support one another and through my blog, we are able to do that.

  4. Thank you, Ilana. I’m doing well during these difficult times, trying to stay informed and educated, I’m healthy and whole.

    I know intuitively that you place priority on the well being of your readers. That’s an awesome service that you provide.

    1. Thanks Tim. Yes, my readers will always be my top priority. I love that you’re doing well during these difficult times that you are healthy and whole.

      You are a positive person by nature. Your cup is half full rather than half empty, so you would always choose to see the positive, no matter how much negativity is thrown at you. I know it is contributing to your wellness.

      Yes, I’ve had to extend what I write about, since there is a lot more happening in the world that is affecting me, than when I first started with my blog 10+ years ago. I would rather not write about things like covid, but it’s the only way I get to remove anxiety, made worse because of autism around covid.

      That said, any trauma or problems around our emotions can leave us with a broken spirit, if we’re not strong enough to cope with it. As a child, I innately understood about spirituality early on and that got me through.

      I agree with your comment about being informed and educated Tim. Both certainly can take the edge off the stress we feel, but with autism, it has taken me months to come to terms with covid and lockdown.

      Now I must come to terms with trying to get back into something that resembles a life moving forward.

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