Trying too hard to make any relationship work means the relationship is forced. Forced relationships can be uncomfortable and hard work and yet those are what many of us deal with. No relationship should ever be forced. Anything forced will never fit.
I’m not sure we always consciously make the connection. Our routines play out unconsciously. But forced relationships aren’t just subjected to one-on-one relationships, they happen in families too.
In some circumstances though, being forced doesn’t necessarily mean we’re doing something against our will, it means we’re trying too hard to make something work. There are different ways to look at something that is forced.
Unfortunately, we spend a lifetime trying to figure out how to make relationships work. We spend a lifetime, putting a huge amount of energy into trying to convince not only ourselves, but our other half that we’re perfect for each other. Any relationship that needs that amount of energy to make it work, will never work.
Like a good wine, conversations and relationships should flow. Two souls that come together don’t need to be continually worked on. When emotional barriers go up, everything becomes forced. Either we’re not getting it, we don’t want to admit, or we scared to move on to the unfamiliar. We also struggle to admit what’s obvious and staring us in the face.
As the familiar serves as a gentle reminder of where we are, we fail to see or accept that we must make new decisions, if we want to change our lives moving forward.