Inferior by consent

“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” Words so true, yet we constantly allow others to make us feel that way.

It’s normal to live with and have these feelings, but it’s what we do with them and how we process them that dictates where we go from there. We live in a world where we have to constantly compete; be there with the best of them and although that is considered normal, it’s often not where some of us are.

It all depends on where we’ve come from and what’s holding us back from our own childhood. It’s not that other people make us feel inferior; they don’t need to. The way I see it, is that all they’re doing is reinforcing what we already know and feel about ourselves.

What we need to do is deal with our own issues; take control back so that we feel more confident about ourselves. Given my physical and emotional needs as a child, I used to feel inferior but that only served to make me feel worse about myself. When I began to see that my issues weren’t about me, I was able to dictate my own rules at my own pace. It was then I began to turn my life around.

Listen to yourself more, listen to others less. Decide on a way forward and work on your confidence and self-esteem issues. When we begin to believe in ourselves, no one will ever make us feel inferior again. I know that because that was me and my life.


28 Jul, 2014

6 thoughts on “Inferior by consent

  1. I totally agree with you. I used to feel inferior a lot. My own family made me feel that way. I was like the black sheep of the family.

    Part was due to the things I had done when I was a teen. I rebelled so I was the trouble maker of the bunch or that’s how I thought others thought of me. I wasn’t involved like all the other ones were.

    I wasn’t invited to do certain things with my cousins and we had a very close family (still are close). I’ve changed that and I see where probably I brought most of the feelings on myself.

    I have changed my life so dramatically and feel better about it. I’m closer to my family now and they include me in things more, if I’m available. My family means a lot to me. I love each and every one of them, especially my mom’s sisters.

    I don’t think of myself as being inferior any more.I’m happier with myself.

    1. Thanks Lisa. Yes the key is being happy with ourselves. When we’re truly happy and at peace with ourselves no one will ever make us feel inferior.

      From what you say about your family Lisa, although things seem to have righted themselves, seeing yourself as the ‘black sheep’ or ‘trouble maker’ must first have been brought about by the way your family made you feel.

      I believe that when we have already got to the stage where we feel others may think of us in this way, they already probably do. It’s not something we think ourselves, it’s something someone else thinks, that make us feel those things.

      Given the times you rebelled as a child, you will have given them ammunition to think all of these things, but none of it is your fault I hasten to add.

      Your family are lucky that you have come full circle and still feel you can have a relationship with them. Someone else with your experiences may have opted out and walked away.

  2. I’m not sure if I’ve ever felt inferior to anyone, but I’ve sensed that others have felt superior to me depending on the circumstances at the time. But Like the old saying goes, “Be nice to people on your way up because you’ll meet the same people on your way down.”

    Inferior by consent or superior by some illusory identity will last as long as we allow it.

    1. Thanks Tim. From my own experiences, anyone would know if they had ever felt inferior. I agree with you that it is up to us to make sure we change the way we feel.

  3. Tim’s post made me smile and I completely agree. We have the power either to accept or reject the way people treat us.

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