Keeping the door shut

Doors are only ever temporarily closed because we’re not great at closing them shut or permanently. It’s important we deal with what’s on the other side of the door, so we can permanently shut the door behind us.

What’s on the other side of the door is the fear we feel. We temporarily close the door short-term, because of the unpleasantness we choose not to deal with; whether it’s an argument we’ve ignored, or an experience we haven’t come to terms with that we’re choosing to ignore. 

In my own case what was on the other side of the door, was me not knowing what I desperately needed to know around my physical and emotional difficulties. Although we don’t consciously think about our experiences, we innately know yet choose to ignore, those early experiences are part of us.

The barriers we continue to create allow us to think we’re not vulnerable, but we’re more vulnerable than we think. The door ajar are our obstacles we choose not to open. But it’s important we make sure we’ve dealt with what’s on the other side and keep the door shut.

When you keep the door closed, you stop thinking about the experiences you’ve been put through and so that when you think about your past and your experiences don’t feel daunting you know you’re healed.


19 Dec, 2018

4 thoughts on “Keeping the door shut

  1. Yes, there are so many doors that I need to close permanently, rather than them pop open when I least expect it and cause so much chaos in my life.

    It’s obvious that my fears, doubts and insecurities, most of them forced upon me by my parents, have kept me stuck in life and paralysed about dealing with them.

    I’m very well aware of them but far too afraid of dealing with them, which is illogical seeing as that would make my life so much better in the long run.

    There are certain doors that should be welded shut seeing as those issues aren’t relevant to dealing with reality now.

    I can’t deal with the present and the future when I’m still drowning in the past.

    1. Randy, your last sentence sums up your response beautifully. That is the reality some of us. Perhaps it’s now time to let it all go.

      As you say and you’re right, on the one hand you know what your issues are, so it’s not logical not to deal with them, but even with the unknown (which isn’t completely unknown) what you have now isn’t the life you want.

      From my own life and experiences and where I am now, we open the door to so many new things in our life when we physically close the door on our past.

      It becomes counter-productive thinking and hoping life will change without actively looking to change your life.

      Think about what you want in 2019 now and choose to make those things happen. Any change you make will become significant.

      Doing that will help you close at least one of those doors on your past.

  2. In life, we will encounter all kinds of people, some good for us, some bad and some harmful.

    At the end of the day, the only person you can rely on is yourself, so it doesn’t make sense to entertain the negative types of people in your life.

    We need to surround ourselves with people who encourage us to grow and who will not be detrimental or harmful influences.

    The people who are harmful, we should think about shutting the door on, as you say so that we can start to heal from their toxicity.

    1. Thanks. Yes, we’re not all in a position to help ourselves and sometimes we need that help. There is no excuse for any of us not helping others unconditionally, regardless of our issues and lives.

      The world would be much better if we all came together, instead of us being divisive and divided. We only have to look to politics, to our governments to see how low they’ve stooped.

      But it’s not only governments, it happens in families, in the work place also. We must all come together and do better.

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