If you’ve been instrumental in trying to help someone who has been through trauma, or it’s your own trauma, it’s easy to feel guilty that you should have been able to help bring the rightful conclusion, so that everyone is happy. I know that the outcome we’re left with, no matter what the outcome is, is where we’re supposed to be.
When a different decision to the one we want is made and we know there’s nothing we can do to change the final outcome, then it’s time to let go. With all trauma, the final outcome will never be the one we worked so hard for, or the one we want. That’s the thing about trauma.
And when dealing with trauma, not everyone will understand our ending. Because of that it would be very easy for us to live with the guilt of not having achieved the outcome we were working for, the outcome we would have had, had we not have had to deal with trauma in the first place.
The truth is that what is done is done. It’s not something we can change, therefore there’s no point in holding on or hankering for a different ending.
Sometimes it’s time to let go and although that’s hard, it’s right.