Modelling behaviour

We model our behaviour on others and expect them to be as we are, but that’s neither realistic, nor how things should be.

We are as we are, they are as they are. Unfortunately, we anticipate and come to expect them to be like we are, to fit into how we see them, wishful thinking on our part, easier in some respects, but not realistic at all. We’re all different and as such we must adapt to fit into other people’s personalities and their lives.

We all come from different backgrounds, have different expectations, different experiences, but still tend to assume others will fit in around our personality. We must come to accept that we’re different, that the way we are, isn’t the way others are. Relationships are such that we must tie into each other’s relationships, work as a team without modelling our behaviour on others and expecting them to conform to the way we are.

We can work as a team and still have our differences. The relationship thing is something we must all work on. We must adapt into each other’s lives, but not expect others to fit into the way we live our lives. Of course, if someone’s behaviour is making us stressed or ill, then they must work to change and put that right, but friendships or relationships aren’t something should have to model.

We must always work at our relationships, be who we are without expecting or taking what we have for granted. That how the other person behaves must somehow fit into how we see them and how we want them to be. That’s not how it works, but that is how we tend to work.


2 May, 2017

4 thoughts on “Modelling behaviour

  1. The only person we should model our behaviour on, is ourselves. It’s our responsibility to ensure our behaviour is appropriate and no one else.

    If we all expect the other person to behave as we would like, we will all be disappointed.

    1. Thanks, yes absolutely. I believe too many people don’t make the effort because they believe others should fit into the way we see them; how we expect and would like them to be.

      As you say with that comes disappointment. When it comes to friendships and relationships, we must all make the effort. Sadly, we don’t.

  2. I indulge diversity in all forms, but on occasions I like to be around like minds.

    Can you imagine a thousand Mr. Anderson’s in one place, thinking and behaving the same way?

    1. Thanks Tim. I think you’re right. There are two ways to look at this. Being around like minded individuals makes for easier relationships, but being around people who are more diverse helps us experience life through others’ culture.

      The more diverse we become the better people we will be. Playing it safe inhibits emotional and spiritual growth. I feel we have less tolerance now than we ever have. We’re not accepting of other people because of their cultures.

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