My values

Everything I write in The CP Diary pays homage to my experiences and emotional wellbeing. On the back of my experiences, each blog carries a value and message.

I love to write about the things that mean something to me, like the values placed upon us as individuals and how those values play out in our lives. The old-fashioned values of caring and making a difference matter to me.

When I was a little girl, I lived in a modest house. My parents weren’t rich and as far as I knew, they weren’t poor either, but I had it instilled in me that to buy something, I had to earn it first. I never asked for anything, but that wasn’t bad, because it taught me about values, not to value materialistic things that I had to find my happiness elsewhere.

I never really understood what my parents’ values were. I’m not sure you do as a child. It’s also not something we talked about. But I knew family was important to my mum.

I took my own values very seriously, but also dealing with a disability I didn’t know I had, meant I saw the world from a completely different angle. From an early age, I began to hone in on the value of relationships. I tried to reach out to others, to talk about my disability, but after a while when that didn’t happen, it became obvious that I needed to be my own emotional support.

As a child, it wasn’t obvious to me why I always aimed to please, conform and look for acceptance, more than my other siblings. I  assumed it had something to do with me being different. Now looking back of course, I am confident that’s what it was.

Now, making sure my own family are happy are what I value the most.

13 Jan, 2011

6 thoughts on “My values

  1. I’ve never really thought about my values. But I have some. Mainly caring about others especially my family. Family mean a lot to me and I thank my parents for instilling this value in me.

    Growing up was fun for me even though I had medical problems, until I turned into a teenager then all the problems set in, but I still had my family and sometimes that made a big difference.

    I never really knew what values my parents held but they were and are good people. My dad would do anything for others and my mom still does anything for others especially for my daughter. She treats her like her own child and that’s helped me a little with her.

    But it has also caused some problems. My mother makes sure I know she is my daughter especially when she has temper tantrums and in those impossible moods! I try to instill the values I grew up with into my daughter.

    Ever since her father died she has had this thing with taking care of animals especially dogs. She has taken in 3 dogs that were abandoned on the side of the road and takes very good care of them. I just wish she would treat people the same way. It’s not that she doesn’t treat others well it’s just different.

    Like a blank stare when made aware of others problems. But she is getting a lot better as she is growing up. She is now 22 years old and is a lot different than a few years ago. The temper tantrums are much less and she really does care about members of her family.

    Sorry to get off topic a little, but anyway values are important to me and caring for others is still the biggest value instilled in me from my parents.

    1. I think of course we all have values instilled in us from childhood, but when you and I were growing up, values were there, but weren’t altogether understood.

      What we do with our children and what we try to instill in them doesn’t always reflect our hard work.

      I think some children have the ability to take on values more than others. We have to remember that there are so many other things to take into consideration. We have peer pressure, our parents, schooling and other outside influences that we have to compete with. Then we have our own relationships with our spouses.

      Children see things, take in what goes on around them, but don’t always hold on to our values and what we teach them.

  2. I agree with you. If you work for the money you earn, then what you buy means more because you worked for it.

    I was blessed with parents who started with very little but worked hard to get everything they needed. I am thankfully not a materialistic person. People and relationships mean much more to me than material things.

    Life can be very lonely without friends.

  3. I’ve had to take a look at my values as of late to really understand what is important to me!

    I was raised not really even knowing what values were, so it has been very hard to learn at this age. I’ve just always pleased people, so much so that my values were so often set aside for what other people valued.

    I’m just praying that I can learn what my values really are and follow my own path for a change.

    1. Randy I believe you can. I was as you were many years ago. There is a balance between pleasing others and pleasing yourself, but learning that will come in time.

      You just have to make the first move.

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