Our fairy tale lives

Having a positive sense of self can and is to be our own fairy tale ending. But to have that we must choose to look behind our relationships at ourselves and be prepared to work at and incorporate emotional and spiritual growth into the equation. Sadly, relationships can’t and don’t give us the fairy tale ending.

I’ve had to fight to exist in my life, to find things out, to bring reasoning back into the equation. Therefore, perhaps fairy tales don’t exist, or if they do maybe not in the way we think. The concept sounds idyllic, but reality bites and we’re back to real-life. Whether it’s families or work, there will always be added stress and no fairy tale endings.

Marriage sadly doesn’t change life, or the stress elements of life. In some ways, marriage brings about more stress because of family’s expectations on both sides. It simply changes our status. Although the status allows us to change the way we feel about ourselves, marriage isn’t as easy as we think. Sadly, our story doesn’t begin at the marriage stage, marriage is simply a continuation of ‘our story.’

Perhaps we must look at this topic differently. What we if we were to let go of the excuses, the complaints, the assumptions and the negative energy, so that we begin to work from our core? What if we were to start building on and changing the way we see our lives and each other and bring respect into the equation?

What if we were to stop dwelling on what we can’t change and change the things we can, including attitudes? Perhaps then we’d get more of the fairy tale life. What if we were also to look for the reasons and lessons in all situations and change the elements that continue to add to our everyday stress?

For us to have a chance of our fairy tale life, we must take all stress and the many complications out and replace them with a life that just ticks over without the stress, better communication and where relationships run like clockwork.

I believe that then becomes our happy ever after life with a fairy tale ending. It’s the attitudes that make it so, not things.


16 Jul, 2017

4 thoughts on “Our fairy tale lives

  1. We were almost at that point in our relationship where things were working smoothly and the future looked wonderful.

    Then disaster hit and things changed. My husband lost his job of 22 years, then luckily got another one part-time, which worked because I was also going back to work. Then I became very ill. Almost died. After getting out of the hospital I was very weak and am still trying to get my strength back today.

    A few months later, my husband got on full-time at his job. We were both happy about that because money was getting short. I couldn’t go back to work. Since then my husband has fallen in love with his job.

    Our son and I come in second now (or so it seems) and I don’t think that’s right. I grew up knowing you are supposed to put your family first. I always did. I even told employers that and they didn’t have a problem with it. But now my happily ever after is fading, it feels like.

    My husband’s first love is his job. I think if I was able some how to get back to work, things would be better and maybe we could get back on track. Maybe it’s just my crazy brain trying to stir up trouble when there isn’t any, but I love romance and happy endings and right now I don’t see it anymore.

    1. Thanks Lisa. Yes, we all love the happy endings and why not, life’s hard enough, but sadly life doesn’t give us that.

      Our upbringing, our families, stress and life getting in the way brings us to this place, where we begin to question what we have and what we go through. We have to work and continue to work on the happy endings scenario, I don’t think any of us find that easy, particularly given the current climate and what we emotionally carry.

      It must also be difficult for you both, because of your illness, which has catapulted you both into a different place and because you deal with a special needs child. Those may also be adding to your stress. We tend to throw ourselves into work, when we’re dealing with stress and we’re not sure how to handle things.

      Perhaps we all must go back to basics on this one and begin to open up and say what we feel. Unless we’re open to talking about things, the things we need to discuss with each other, tend to get overlooked. How we are is because of what we get to deal with, but we can always change that.

      We need to work together to want to make things better for each other and to turn things around. It’s how we all function when we’re home that counts.

  2. I am not so sure there is such a thing as a fairy tale life. It is what you make it, but when is that ever a Disney fairy tale?

    Surviving gets in the way and wreaks havoc along its path, much like a storm. The extent to which we come out the other end intact or damaged, depends on us.

    1. Your last paragraph sums up your response nicely. Yes, quite. ‘The extent to which we come out the other end intact or damaged, depends on us.’

      Although we may not always initially be to blame for where we start off, what we continue to put up with, is very much down to us. And yes, that does depend on us.

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