Sadly, when parents do things at their own convenience, they distance themselves emotionally and it is the emotional distance that stays with the child.
For children of some divorced parents, they may potentially do even less, but children whose parents stay together for the sake of their children, don’t get an easy ride either. In a way it’s harder for those children, because there’s little physical separation, whose children still need to cope having both parents present.
As a child, to know that you come second best isn’t easy to comprehend; but harder for a child who carries a disability and has to work through their disability emotionally on their own, as I have had to do.
Of course, for any child being raised by parents who work from this standpoint, that will do little for a child’s confidence and self-esteem. For the child, it’s often difficult to switch off to that kind of parenting, because children will naturally want to crave the love and support.
It’s the love and support that gets a child through their childhood, balanced. On the part of the child, whose parents do things at their own convenience, they will continue to aim to please in the hope that pleasing will bring a different understanding, attitude and outcome from their family.