Our parents’ perceptions of us and how they see and behave towards us, will be the same way we see and behave towards our own children.
When it comes to parenting, it’s easy for parents to judge. Whether it’s part of a twin scenario or not, it’s important children are parented individually. Times have changed, but through formed unconscious patterns, what’s gone before and what we know to do, is what we will repeat.
Consciously, we must start and continue to work on change. Although the norm would be to hold on to what we know, it’s important we make the changes as we go. Children are different, they all have different needs and therefore they need us to parent them differently.
And although our environment is the same, children will always cope differently and therefore will display different personality traits. Responsibilities and expectations also play their part, as children learn to get to grips with the life thing. It’s up to us as parents to make sure we accommodate our children’s emotional needs.
It may be that one child is more assertive, another more sensitive, another insecure and so on. But whatever the child is, one size certainly doesn’t fit all and therefore, neither should the way we parent. How easy it would be to continually blame the child with the issues, the difficult child.
It’s always important to understand and individually parent children, so that they are brought to task on the things they need to learn from, in a conciliatory way that helps them understand and to continually give them praise.
I know from my own children that children will always want to aspire and will want to do well for themselves with the right encouragement, therefore it’s up to us as parents to instill encouragement and confidence in them.
We can only do that by perceiving them in a way that encourages them to grow emotionally as individuals.