Spending time on our own

I did have someone close to me who not only struggled with being alone, he also didn’t like himself, which didn’t help and that added to how he felt about spending time on his own. Are you happy spending time in your own company, or does the prospect send shivers down your spine?

Perhaps at the heart of this is how we see ourselves and whether we even like ourselves. Sadly, there is a correlation between how we feel about ourselves and being alone. We can’t use our past as an excuse, it’s not how it works, but it’s usually how we work.

If being alone is something you’re not used to, the first time can be slightly difficult, but when you start to spend more time in your own company, you will get to feel much better about doing it. If we do something long enough, we get used to the idea and that gives us a different outlook, a different way to think and a different way to be.

It’s also easy to pick up on other people’s nervous tension, energy and stress, which adds to our stress, which is why time out is even more important. We can be at our most creative when we’re on our own. I know that I am. That aside though, it’s important we make time for ourselves.

Although doing something we’ve never done before can make us anxious, it’s also a brave and courageous thing to do. It’s important for us to start liking ourselves, to want to spend a little more time on our own. It’s important for our health.


1 Dec, 2016

2 thoughts on “Spending time on our own

  1. I used to date a women who didn’t want to be alone for an hour, she hungered for company to survive.

    At the time I wondered what she was afraid of, but before I found out I was headed for the door.

    1. Thanks Tim. I think the heading for the door was a clear indication of your understanding of the situation with your girlfriend then. Unfortunately, the less comfortable we are being on our own, the more needy and less independent we are.

      Perhaps that is something you had already worked out. Although I understand your predicament Tim at that time, it must have been particularly hard for you; but it would never have been your responsibility to bridge that gap for her.

      Having seen how this works first hand, I find it sad that your girlfriend felt she couldn’t do it.

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