Teaching children right

Children learn by example. If they trust what their parents say and it makes sense, they will want to emulate and do what we their parents do, eventually.

If we get the parenting thing right, children should emerge with clear views on the most important values. It’s our value system that acts as our children’s potential guide, therefore it’s important we get the parenting thing right.

Children will take what they need and will always learn:

  • When their parents are there to listen, they will understand that their parents are interested and open enough to listen. They will also understand we’re on their side;
  • When we’re compassionate, they learn that they can be compassionate too even in the face of adversity. That emotions fluctuate, emotions can be worked through that emotions can be managed;
  • When something happens, they will learn not to blame, but to solve;
  • When we forgive they find it in themselves to understand what it means to forgive. It also shows children no one is perfect and that it’s right to forgive. We should never hold a grudge;
  • When parents apologise, children learn it’s okay for them to apologise too. It shows them how to be responsible and to use compassion;
  • And that for every action there is a consequence. Children will understand more when we explain what those consequences will be.

It’s not okay for parents to swear, in the same way it’s not okay for parents to blatantly lie about things to get themselves out of trouble. It’s important not to punish. There are always other ways to bring children to task. Punishing a child reinforces their crime.

When parents talk things through, children come to understand more, rather than punish. If we explain in a way children will understand, they will learn. Children learn by example, so it’s important we show them kindness, generosity, responsibility, compassion and honesty and all the other things we want them to learn. We need to get those things right.

As long as parents’ values aren’t forced on their children and even if we don’t see those values being used, children will always go back to them. Parenting our children right keeps both us and our children safe.

8 Aug, 2016

4 thoughts on “Teaching children right

  1. It’s up to us to show children the right way and it is something all parents should aim to do. I particularly agree with your last sentence.

    It’s fundamental that we ensure our children’s safety. Your blog highlights positive parenting; which can help us achieve that.

    1. Thank you. Yes I think so too.

      Even if we don’t achieve the full complement of parenting skills, we should at least try to do our best so that our children get the best out of their lives when they enter the world independently of us.

  2. It’s a shame how so many children are growing up entrenched by invisible parents who are pretty much children themselves. So children pass their time without any real parental involvement, so they eventually become an annoyance to society, it’s a sickly vicious cycle.

    So this blog is very important in that it covers everything we need to know to raise our children properly.

    1. Thanks Tim. I’ve known parents who fit part of your description, but I couldn’t vouch whether they were children themselves or just selfish because they wanted their own lives.

      I believe the outcome is the same whether they fit into one category or another and find the whole thing very sad. I feel it’s important that whatever our background we put our children first, show them compassion, empathy and tolerance and do our best for them, so they can go on to do the best for their own children.

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