The art of negotiation

1 Jul 2016

All successful communication begins with our ability to negotiate and find a compromise and whilst some of us may think that means we’re giving in, in the longer term it actually makes us stronger.

Negotiations strengthen our resolve and authority. It means we’re mature enough to look beyond the title tattle that comes with arguments and disagreements, always having to be right, always having to have the last word.

Any form of negotiation needs working at. It’s something that needs to be honed and has to start in childhood. Although negotiating may seem difficult at first, negotiating gets easier the more we practice, but it also depends on the person we’re trying to negotiate with and the circumstances. It’s a tool that if done conciliatory will shape our behaviour and lives positively.

When it comes to any form of negotiation, others will always come to respect those of us who are willing to listen and negotiate sensitively with them. Negotiating shows others that we are open to listening and that will always strengthen the bond, whether negotiations are between family, friends or even work colleagues. Negotiation is about mediation.

If handled correctly of course, all negotiations can be a positive experience. It’s important to be approachable and open to other people’s viewpoint. Negotiating is a discussion, a talking point a chance to listen to someone else’s viewpoint that isn’t our own. All it takes is an open mind and an ability to listen.

It’s also a chance for us to come to understand another person’s perspective, which often can be very helpful in us looking at the bigger picture if we’re not seeing it.

4 Responses to “The art of negotiation”

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  1. Tim 01. Jul, 2016 at 7:20 pm #

    I think a good negotiator appeals to reason and controls the speed of a conversation by speaking slowly and with clarity. No one likes a fast talker who jives their way through negotiations. Thoughtful people are taken much more seriously.

    But I’ve noticed that fast moving conversations are prevalent these days, it allows very little space to negotiate anything.

    • Ilana 01. Jul, 2016 at 7:29 pm #

      Thanks Tim. Yes, I think you’re right, but I can’t help but wonder whether those type of people would rather not negotiate anyway.

      Emotionally, if we’re not at one with someone else, the last thing we’ll want to do is have a conversation, let alone go into negotiations with them.

      Speaking slowly and with clarity are both important when it comes to conversation and negotiation.

  2. Brad 03. Jul, 2016 at 8:02 am #

    Negotiation is a mind set. We have to make a conscious decision to employ the skills needed to help. This isn’t something that just happens, but something that we really need to work on.

    I think we all have the ability to use negotiation positively, but unfortunately some flatly refuse to see the importance or need of negotiation in relationships; and they are usually the ones who need it the most.

    • Ilana 03. Jul, 2016 at 8:39 am #

      Thanks, yes I agree although I can’t help but think those who flatly refuse do so for selfish reasons. We tend not to consciously see how we are. We know what we know, like what we like and usually stick to those principles.

      Personally, I think it sad that we choose not to negotiate and want to do better for ourselves and for those close to us.

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