By the time we’re 7 years old our characters are fully formed. If we’re lucky enough to have had love and support up to that point, we should continue to thrive emotionally.
But what happens when we’ve had no support, when that voice in our head belittles our very existence, starts to draw comparisons with other people and we become convinced by the things we tell ourselves?
But as my story shows, we don’t have to buy into it, we can change and go on to live fulfilling lives, even without the support. We can look at past experiences, situations, find new understandings and look for new emotional endings.
Emotionally with work on ourselves I believe we can bring a different thought process into the equation and that helps change how we see and deal with things. If we’re still subjected to abuse, it would be difficult to change those circumstances, until you’re clear of the abuse, but it is possible to change the story in our minds, so that we’re not continually taking in other people’s negativity, or abuse.
How do we change?
We change by challenging our thoughts and so that we’re working through each experience as it happens, using our conscious thoughts to change our understanding on some of those experiences, so that we’re looking at the bigger picture, understanding everyone’s part in the process and that changes how we see things and how we are.
We can’t change other people’s behaviour or our experiences, but we can change the way we think and perceive their behaviour and make the issue about them. That means seeing those people as being responsible. The sad reality is that we often don’t, instead we carry other people’s guilt, when they choose not to accept responsibility.
It’s the unconscious thinking told in story form, is why we continue to live negative lives. Bringing our thoughts back into the present moment and challenging ourselves to work through our issues, will allow us to perceive our lives differently.