Trauma – grieving

Grieving is something that we all experience at some point in our lives, but it becomes easier when we understand why.

I appreciate that may not happen for everyone, but through our beliefs I believe we can begin to understand the grieving process and why our loved ones have to make their journey on their own. I draw comfort from knowing my loved ones are around me.

When we lose someone we temporarily go through a loss of security, especially if the person we lose was very instrumental in our lives. For those of us who survive trauma, we will go through the grieving process too and that process can be painful. Like a loss, grieving is the normal process of a traumatic event.

Working through trauma works best when you have a good support team around you. Talking about how you feel is always the best way to deal with trauma.

23 Jul, 2010

6 thoughts on “Trauma – grieving

  1. Grieving can be so different from person to person. When my mother died I felt like all the pain was gone, she was finally at peace. She had struggled for over a year at that point. But the worst I think was the timing of her death 9 days after my 49th birthday and a week before my brother turned 50. That is why November will never be a happy month ever again.

    My brother took my Mother’s death very hard. He was not there to see her decline like I was. I actually was with her when she passed. Nothing like in the movies at all. I will never forget that day as long as I live.

    1. I know you were very close to your mother Randy, but nevertheless it must have been particularly hard for you seeing your mum decline and then pass. I saw my mother decline, but not completely. My mum went to Germany and then came back after her death. My father brought her home.

      My mum would have found it difficult to have died at home. I think she wanted us to remember her the way she left, still looking beautiful. But you are so right we all deal with grief differently.

      1. My mother did not want her children to know that she was terminal. I found out from my father who told me just before her last Christmas. She was given 3 to 6 months, she lived almost 11. She at one time wanted to die at home but changed her mind 4 days prior to actually dying, she went into the hospital for serious pain management.

        1. It’s a shame but I feel there is a stigma behind death, no-one will talk about it. I believe people would feel so much more at ease with the idea of their loved ones passing into spirit.

          If there was more of an understanding of the death process, people wouldn’t be so scared, so would be more inclined to talk about the process.

  2. You are so right about the grieving with trauma and some people don’t understand that. I’ve been through and am still in the grieving process. I don’t think we really ever stop. It may not be in the front of our mind but its there.

    1. I think you are right Lisa for some the grieving process probably never stops, but I still believe that if the death process was talked about more through places of worship and families, we would know and feel more comfortable around death and understand that death is eternal not final.

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