Words can unlock our thinking but we either spend a life disengaging, or engaging, reacting inappropriately, get that wrong, then disengage again.
Unproductive actions that lead us to nowhere, instead of using our time productively to unlock our thinking, engage our thoughts, create conversations that allow us to think about present or future possibilities.
As children, we learn to disengage, but sometimes disengaging isn’t helpful when we need to stick up for ourselves on the things that need correcting, things that are said or done. Sadly, our upbringing, our environment, family and siblings, are often the reason we disengage.
Perhaps we learn where we come in the pecking order, which sibling is more important. We learn it’s easier not to say anything, than to say something and get ourselves into trouble. We follow the patterns that are simply easier, less traumatic; then realise later just how much harder everything has become, when we have to engage ourselves again.
As adults, we learn how important it is to engage, to live our lives; to get our points across, but staying engaged needs emotional work and that needs to be a priority.
Finally, we must engage and take control of our lives, rather than rely on others who over time may come to control us.