My Book’s valuable lessons

Although my Book brings clarity and closure around my disability, in my personal life, life hasn’t changed. The book hasn’t changed attitudes.

My Book teaches me many valuable lessons. We have to know who we are and be okay with what we do, regardless of other people’s thinking on what we do. To stay emotionally well, we must care less about the people who care less about us.

If we meet with success we should accept that we have and we mustn’t feel bad. In the book I talk about believing I would end up going to the grave without knowing about my disability. My Book outlines just how powerful the universe is.

Both my Book and my experiences have taught me that it’s okay to be proud of what I have achieved. For the first time I am standing tall. Now others must reconcile.

It has also taught me that it is okay to care when it matters that it’s okay to care about those who care about us. Caring less ensures my sanity. For those who don’t care, or don’t choose to make a difference, then it’s okay for us to let go. We mustn’t own or carry other people’s guilt.

Doing our best means our best will get better. We will also get to live a more peaceful life when we care about the people that matter and not the people who suck the life out of us. It’s okay to care where appropriate.

For the first time, my Book has given me my life, my sanity and an altogether better life for knowing about my disability – ‘we should celebrate other people’s success as if it were our own’ – not to implies we have a problem and will struggle to find and meet our own success.

That is genuinely part of the problem. Others need to be happy for us and be okay with what we do. If the shoe were on the other foot they would expect nothing less.

For anyone interested in reading and purchasing my book Cerebral Palsy: ‘A Story’ you can purchase it through @RedDoorBooks or through the following links – UK or – US.

7 May, 2020

4 thoughts on “My Book’s valuable lessons

  1. When I received your book I was standing tall, standing proud and absolutely amazed at your transparency. Your task was not to search for identity, but to simply free your identity.

    You were standing tall way before you authored your book, I assure you. Many of us are standing tall after reading your book; my mind awoke automatically.

    1. Thanks Tim. Your response heartens me. The difficult part for any author who writes about their experiences in this way is finding a balance.

      Having gone through every word, every page, every chapter with a fine tooth comb, if I had my time again with the book, there is nothing in the book I would change. And you’re right, for years I had no identity I was ‘Ilana’ with the disability she didn’t know she had.

      I needed to free myself from the shackles of my experiences, I needed to stand tall, to recall my experiences in the way they happened, but in a way that offered explanation, positivity and hope for others too.

      You talk about my transparency. Being able to open up in the book and put a positive slant on each negative experience has not only brought about my spiritual and emotional growth, but it has also normalised my thinking.

      Writing in the way I have, allowed me to be ‘myself’ in a world where I was continually having to be what everyone else wanted me to be. For the first time I got to know me and that feels amazing.

      Even though your experiences are different to mine, you have now taken the same journey as me. I love the fact that you have taken from the book, what I set out for the reader to take.

  2. Your book has taught us that the only way we can live is if we grow and you show us how. To bring that clarity and hope in these dark times is unique.

    1. Thank you. You’re not supposed to sing your own praises, but my book is uniquely different to what’s out there.

      Yes, it’s a memoir, self-help and mind/body/spirit book, but it is written from a universal stand point and that brings clarity and makes my book unique.

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