It's an emotional strain living with cerebral palsy. Although I pride myself on coping quite well, it often depends on what’s going on in my life.
I tend to have a lot of things going on, so whatever I am dealing with at the time that becomes the support. I don’t dwell on what I deal with, I think I realised why from a very young age. That way I didn't have to put anyone in a position where they felt they had to help. Other things seemed to take priority anyway.
I have always been independent, probably comes with the territory. I learned how to cope because I had no choice. I don’t think anyone who doesn’t have what I have, will truly ever understand what it's like to feel what I feel. There is no information out there about the emotional side of what we deal with.
I never gave any thought about what it was like for others living with cerebral palsy, until I joined a cerebral palsy forum and came across people like myself who were living with the condition. I think when we deal with something other people have, we automatically have a natural empathy with each other.
Meeting with other people through social media sites has been such a positive and welcoming experience for me. For the first time I am able to understand what it feels like to know that I'm not alone.
My Parents tried to overprotect me from the world when I was growing up. In the end it did not work. I still had to deal with my disability and the other kids reaction to it.
When I moved on, my own my mother one day said that she never realized at that point how independent I was. That was really my first chance to be on my own and to learn how to live on my own and enjoy it.
Randy, I am pleased it worked for you, although you've said your parents were over protective, I know your mother supported you.
I should think that isn't the case for everyone though. We tend to rely on our childhood experiences, particularly our parents to show us the way forward, so that we can adapt in the world as adults, living with our problems/disabilities.
When that doesn't happen we ultimately struggle, unless we know how to make those changes.
You are right on that point.
Thank you.
I was too was over protected from the world because of my illness and although I've learned how to be on my own, I still depend on others. I lived a life of loneliness as a teenager, not really having friends because of my illness.
Now I stay so busy working, I don't go anywhere to meet anyone or the few friends I do have I hardly see cause I'm usually too tired or busy.
Lisa, it's how that generation parented. It must have something to do with us being different to our siblings, because of our struggles. Because I was the only one with cerebral palsy out of four children, they mothered me the most because of what I was dealing with.
I also didn't have an abundance of friends either, but kids are cruel and where they should make an effort with kids who struggle because they deal with something, they tend to pick us out instead, for all the wrong reasons.
As for now, in this busy world we live in, I don't think you're alone in not seeing your friends. Our world revolves around families and making time for friends isn't always easy to do.