It's a normal response for us to want to avoid the things we fear. Exposing yourself to fear is perfectly normal, and is something you should do, we should all do, if we are to overcome fear. There is a famous saying, perfectly worded... "feel the fear and do it anyway." (Source: SusanJeffers)
Fear is Normal
Fear is normal. We will all feel fear at some point in our lives. Fear if confronted can help us learn to avoid dangerous situations. It instinctively helps protect us from harm, fear helps us recognise danger and, in some circumstances, will help us to make safer decisions. Exposing ourselves to things that we fear, can make us feel less anxious. Fear isn't always dangerous but worth the effort, if we are to come through the other end better people.
Fear and Apprehension
Fear when coupled with apprehension, may prevent us from living our dream. We may have a fear of public speaking, and that stops us from career progression. Fear can hold us back, it may also make us overthink things. The key to working through fear is being emotionally and mentally ready to confront the fear you feel. Apprehension usually accompanies fear and that can be far worse than fear itself.
Fear is not always bad
Fear is not always bad and can create change. In the longer term the more you're exposed to fear, the more you will get used to understanding how to deal with fear. Not all situations are fearful – it's usually how we perceive that situation that creates the fear we feel.
Fear has been the main driving force in my life, it has also kept me paralysed and afraid of my own shadow. I was brainwashed to believe that I didn't have many choices in life and that I had to endure whatever came along.
Most people can't even begin to comprehend what it was like, which makes my life even more difficult. I feel alone even in the middle of a large crowd.
In the last year or so I have tried hard to overcome those fears, but it's harder said than done. I know the only way that I will be able to enjoy my life, is to do just that.
It will be difficult but I'm sure that it can be done.
Thanks Randy. I imagine as a child it will have been very difficult for you with your parents.
I'm so pleased that's not your life any more and you have choices now. I agree with you that our thoughts and memories are often difficult to move on from and those sometimes create the fear we feel.
As you say Randy the only way you'll be able to enjoy your life is to just get on with it. But to know there is a better life the other side of fear, I feel is a good enough reason to give it a go.
When we do nothing and just exist, that is worse, because then we get to live with the what ifs.
Since the recent deaths of my mother and sister I have lived almost entirely with fear. It has become my companion, but I'd like to get divorced from it as soon as possible. I probably should have a conversation with my mind about that.
It could be that I'm more threatening to myself than fear; I think about that sometimes.
Sadly no one talks about death in the same way they talk about life.
But it's one subject that needs to be spoken about because losing a loved one, can leave us completely paralysed and alone mentally. Like a void, it's there when you wake up and there when you go to sleep.
I also think it depends on your relationship with that person too. I remember as a child thinking about how I would cope without my parents in my life.
If you can look at death as a transition from one world to another, I think you will begin to feel more comfortable about the idea of death.
I believe people 'pass over' rather than die. I also believe your mother and sister are around you just not with you. I also believe that as soon as they crossed to the other side, they knew it was their time, therefore they were okay to make the transition.
They will want you to be okay this side of life also. For you not to worry about them, not to feel fear, but to continue with your own life, knowing they are okay tucked away the other side of life.
Living with fear can be a threat to our health. Reconcile and let go.