Something inspirational:
“I eventually came to understand that in harboring the anger, the bitterness and resentment towards those that had hurt me, I was giving the reins of control over to them. Forgiving was not about accepting their words and deeds. Forgiving was about letting go and moving on with my life. In doing so, I had finally set myself free.”
ISABEL LOPEZ, Isabel's Hand-me-down Dreams
Forgiveness does equal freedom. I have forgiven people that have hurt me in some way or other and feel much better for it.
A few of them know I forgave them but most don't but they really don't realize that they hurt me. That's what I get for being so sensitive.
I'm better than I used to be. I can laugh off most of the remarks which are made in fun or in anger. I feel relieved when I forgive others especially when I forgive myself.
Thanks Lisa. I'm not sure you should have to laugh off the remarks others make in anger or fun, whether you feel you're sensitive or not.
If someone genuinely says something which they thought sounded okay, but turns out did offend, then that's perfectly acceptable an honest mistake, but when things are said out of anger or in fun then that's not right.
Just because you may be slightly sensitive doesn't give someone the right to overstep the mark.
I think we have to forgive ourselves, that is especially important. I'm pleased you feel relieved when you do.
Forgiving those who hurt us is liberating, it's the wise thing to do , but it would be foolish to forget.
Thanks Tim. You're absolutely right.
It helps of course if an apology is forthcoming or we're able to understand or see the bigger picture why someone would behave in the way they do. I agree that it's liberating but I'm not sure we ever forget and that's okay, just as long as we can move on without living with the added stress.
Forgiving is something I have never really been good at, but I have been trying very hard to learn how to do it!
I've already wasted so much of my life on dwelling on things that were down to me, which didn't hurt anyone but myself. I've heard it said that dwelling on resentments is like swallowing poison and expecting the other person to die from it!
I don't have a time machine so I can't change the past but I can work on doing my best in the future.
Thanks Randy. I agree we make decisions, they are our choices. We all do things we're not proud of, but if we're given the love and support we should have as children, I'm not sure how many children would go on to do things that years later they would later go on to regret.
Sometimes where we are, isn't always initially down to us. There is always a bigger picture on what we have to deal with and why we would then make the wrong decisions.
We have to learn to forgive ourselves and just let go.
Great post. I think resentment is bad for our soul. We need to forgive and forget in order to enjoy our life.
Please check out my blog diomangel27.blogspot.com/ where I write about me having CP.
Thanks for posting and welcome to the site Diomayra. I absolutely agree with you, resentment is bad for the soul and it's also bad for our physical health.
I am happy to include a link to your site here and you are very welcome to post again on The CP Diary.
http://diomangel27.blogspot.co.uk/
For me Tim has got this particularly spot on.
Forgiving and forgetting are two very different issues and I have no intention of ever forgetting some things that have been said or done to me and my family, but I am aware that I do need to work on forgiving.
I understand your comment and I agree with Tim too. In order to have a more stress free life, we should if we can work on forgiveness as it's good for the soul.
We never forget what happens to us by someone else and as long as we don't carry that as a problem it's fine not to forget, but not to forgive means we'll carry more stress and that can make us physically ill.
We need to let go.