Even with good intentions, being a parent isn’t an easy job. In some respects, it’s the nature of what parenting is. Loving parents will make decisions around what they think is best for their children that may not sit well with their children.
Parents' Loving Acts
But loving acts by a parent in the interest of their children may not appear or feel loving by their children. Children hate being disciplined and may not agree with their parents' decisions. Just because children don’t like their parents’ discipline or decisions, doesn’t define their acts as wrong, or unloving.
We Should all Assume Good Intentions
Children don't always know what they need, but they know what they want. Children should understand why parents make the decisions they do. We should all assume good intentions. Extended families should work the same way. Assuming the best, means everyone is more likely to work together, rather than want to go in and judge and form opinions. We should avoid a few wrong turns, we may endure problems, but we should keep moving forward. But it is important children look at the whole, rather than piece by piece. Looking at the whole shows the bigger picture.
Most Parents Support their Children
Most parents will support their children and act in their children’s best interests. Parents with good intentions and who care, will always do what they can to make sure their good intentions are received. Children may not always agree with how their parents’ discipline. It is only when they go on to have their own children that they will fully understand.
We never really knew what our parents intentions were, seeing as they seemed to change from day to day and to suit their needs.
It would have been nice to know what was going on with them, rather than being forced to take a wild guess. I'm guessing that they did have good intentions at times, but in their case the road to hell was paved with their kind of good intentions.
I wanted to do a better job with my own children, but in the end that didn't work because I didn't deal with my own issues, so didn't get that right.
I can only try to do the right thing now and do my best to make up for it, hoping I'm given the chance.
Thanks Randy. Yes, as children it's not always obvious what our parents' intentions are and that's fine most of the time. I believe that innately we all start off with good intentions, but issues get in the way, and we fail to cope.
In your case Randy, even though it was something you missed whilst your daughter was little because you had issues that you deal with, you have tried to make it up to her and you can be forgiven for that.
It is difficult to forgive parents who put themselves first and fail to think about their children, particularly when one child deals with a disability.