Something inspirational:

“The most fundamental aggression to ourselves, the most fundamental harm we can do to ourselves, is to remain ignorant by not having the courage and the respect to look at ourselves honestly and gently.”

Pema Chödrön

Ilana Estelle is a mental health and wellbeing advocate who combines educational insight with her personal experience of living with physical, mental, and emotional disabilities. She holds diplomas in Counselling, Diet and Nutrition, Nutritional Therapy, Psychotherapy and Counselling, and Stress Management. Through her writing, Ilana supports others in navigating their emotional, mental, and physical health challenges. In addition to writing for The CP Diary, her work has appeared in healthy lifestyle magazines. Ilana is also the author of three books: Cerebral Palsy: A Story – Finding the Calm After the Storm, Spirituality, Healing and Me, and Survival: The Covid Years – Time for Change.

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8 comments on “A Pema Chodron quote”

    1. Thanks Lisa. Yes you're right, we must. It's one of the hardest things to do, but well worth the effort once we've achieved it.

    1. Not many of us will, but we all can. 'Look within and you shall find...' as they say. I believe we all can and it works.

  1. I have tortured myself for so very long for the mistakes that I had made in my life, so I find it very hard to take it easy on myself!

    I'm trying very hard to do things differently so that I can treat myself better, so that the rest of my life will be much better.

    1. Thanks Randy. This is how it worked for me; just wondering if it will help you too. I began to stand back so that I could look at the bigger picture of my life and it's then that I came to realise that all of what I had done up to the point of taking control back, had nothing to do with me.

      I felt guilty for many years on my education particularly and would constantly harbour the point in my mind. It does take great effort to change the way we perceive all the things we've done or not done in my case, but it's well worth the effort when we can stand back and start being kinder to ourselves.

      There comes a time when we must take stock and put the blame back emotionally on to those who are primarily responsible for us. The decisions you have made are of a consequence of your own circumstances growing up in a dysfunctional family.

      I truly hope you succeed at doing things differently now. You deserve to have peace Randy.

  2. I can honestly say that I've learned to forgive myself and critique myself with a certain gentleness.

    I think we settle into ourselves at some point in our lives and realize that whatever we had dreamed of being and all we had done or failed to do, is completely okay.

    1. Thanks Tim. What you describe Tim tends to happen in later decades, when we've worked through the maize of life. Our upbringing has a lot to do with how we see and perceive ourselves.

      I've seen it happen both ways. I have seen what you describe; I have also seen one or two struggle to come to terms with their life and achievements; or lack of. As ever it often comes down to our perceptions, being able to let go and just be okay with things.

      That bit isn't always easy.

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