It’s not surprising that I’ve had another tough summer. With a second operation now behind us and back in our usual university and school routines, I am beginning to feel better.

I’ve worked tirelessly concentrating on my resolve once more to bring about a more positive outcome and I feel it’s worked. I’m tired, but that's part of the territory on what I've been dealing with. We all have a resolve, though for some it probably seems that others have more of a resolve than us.

Why is a resolve important?

Well without it, we’ll never accomplish anything, particularly when we’re working through trauma and related issues dealing with trauma. It’s our resolve that helps us stay focused, with a quiet determination that we’ll stay the course.

A resolve helps us accomplish even the smallest of things, without which we’ll achieve very little. It's part of our deep intuition; like an adrenalin rush, routed deep within us. It’s the innate feeling you get when part of you is already telling you to give up.

Although it wasn’t easy dealing with the assault, I was determined to wake up with a renewed resolve. A new day was another opportunity for me to work on my resolve again, so that we’d pull through once more as a family. It was that little voice telling me I had to carry on. Giving up wasn’t an option; I had others relying on me.

What weakens our resolve?

Anything we deal with that is negative does, such as being critical; physical or emotional abuse and judging other people are all common causes. Constantly worrying about things that haven’t happened yet, living with uncertainties, dwelling on the past so that you feel both anger and guilt, on unresolved issues that have never been dealt with.

All of these eventually tap into our resolve and dampen the spirit that resides within us. We must work on thinking positive thoughts and we'll build on our resolve once more, ready to face and deal with those issues.

Ilana Estelle is a mental health and wellbeing advocate who combines educational insight with her personal experience of living with physical, mental, and emotional disabilities. She holds diplomas in Counselling, Diet and Nutrition, Nutritional Therapy, Psychotherapy and Counselling, and Stress Management. Through her writing, Ilana supports others in navigating their emotional, mental, and physical health challenges. In addition to writing for The CP Diary, her work has appeared in healthy lifestyle magazines. Ilana is also the author of three books: Cerebral Palsy: A Story – Finding the Calm After the Storm, Spirituality, Healing and Me, and Survival: The Covid Years – Time for Change.

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2 comments on “About resolve”

  1. Great post Ilana!!

    My resolve was great until we got our son. Now I find myself worrying more and criticising myself for things I did or didn't do, or for things I should be doing.

    I'm getting back to my normal-self and dealing with things better, being more positive as we move along and get everything normalized as best we can.

    1. I am sure it all comes from your situation being new Lisa. Adoption isn't easy, you want things to be right then worry if you think they're not.

      I think you'll be fine with time. You'll certainly feel you can relax a lot more once you're more familiar with everything.

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