We're human, we make mistakes, we must accept we make mistakes, we get things wrong. It’s not enough for us just to outline where we went wrong, we should apologise. It shows you're the bigger person.
Where others are relying on us to take a lead role, we should go that extra mile. We shouldn't avoid responsibility if we've made a mistake. The way we handle ourselves counts.
Explanations don’t act as an apology, an apology is an apology. We wait for others to accept and take responsibility for themselves so that they are accountable, and yet we don’t do it ourselves.
When it comes to us, we’re often less willing to accept we got it wrong. Perhaps that’s got something to do with cognitive dissonance, particularly when our sense of self becomes threatened. It makes you the bigger person when you can accept you got something wrong.
Yes, I feel like I have been apologizing pretty much my whole life. I was made to apologize for so many things as a kid which weren't my fault, like for my parents being so miserable and even for the fact of being born since we were "such burdens!"
It gets so very convoluted, when you grow up feeling like a mistake to even know what you're apologizing for. I'm sure that is why I have tortured myself for so long, because we weren't exactly allowed to make mistakes without having a dump truck full of guilt, shame and remorse piled on for good measure.
It's no wonder that I'm obviously so neurotic about it. The biggest issue was that nobody ever showed us how to do the right thing, so we often didn't even realize that we were making a mistake to begin with.
Thanks Randy. Yes, it's very difficult when you're made to feel it's your fault all the time.
And where parents should be admitting what they've done wrong and because they don't we're made to carry the guilt. I'm with you on that.
But all we can do is try to understand and move forward and accept where we go wrong for our own children.
I agree. How else can we start to pit things right unless we first accept we got things wrong? That way we can learn from the experience too.
I know many people who simply refuse to accept they can ever be wrong and that someone else is always to blame. I gave up trying to change those people a long time ago.
I don't need to convince them, I'll leave that to their karma.
Thank you. Yes, I agree. In answer to your question, we can't.
But your third paragraph sums up your response beautifully. Karma will always correct and balance where it needs to.
It's not for us to try to convince anyone.