There are many facets to self-esteem. Children’s brains are like sponges, absorbing as much information as they can. The messages they get eventually turn into self statements. Their beliefs, attitudes and thoughts become ingrained, and turn into a part of them that isn’t always accurate, but is accepted as true facts.
Other people's reactions, particularly from parents, shape a child’s sense of self-worth. Any negative reactions they have will become stumbling blocks and that creates low self-esteem.
There are things we can all do to help boost low self-esteem, below:
Accept a compliment
It is hard to accept a compliment when you’ve never been paid one. Compliments must be felt: they’re not simply words. Instead of dismissing a compliment outright from someone, accept and acknowledge to yourself the fact that they wanted to pay you the compliment.
Avoid labels
This is a common problem for a lot of people. But try to avoid pulling yourself down by saying things like you’re ‘stupid’, ‘lazy’, ‘can’t’, ‘should’ and ‘never’, and instead introduce words that renew your confidence, like ‘I can’, ‘I shall’, and ‘I will’.
Make self-esteem unconditional
Change your inner voice and embrace yourself unconditionally by facilitating a more compassionate attitude towards yourself. Take away thoughts like, ‘I’ll like myself better when’ and replace it with thoughts like, ‘I like myself now’.
Write your thoughts down on paper
What we write down can become a self-help tool and is the first step to noting our internal dialogue: internal dialogue can always be changed. The changes we incorporate into our life should be small but significant ones that happen over a period of time.
There will be lots of days where we feel we’re not achieving anything, but each significant step means we will become mentally stronger.
Try not to torment yourself over the things you feel you’ve failed at. A parting thought on this particular topic, perhaps it’s not that you’ve failed, perhaps those things were never meant for you.
Yeah, my self-esteem used to be pretty bad. I would get the "you can't do that," thing from my mother and I was lower than my sister. Plus I would get picked on in school by different kids, so I've always had low self-esteem. I think my being in dance school and several other things when I was a teen helped out a little, but mostly when I became a nurse helped me mostly, I had purpose and that was to help others.
Absolutely Lisa, but although you are helping others, you still need to work on your self-esteem, because away from your job you have to be able to live with 'you' and that is always hard if you're not feeling it.
Good topic very timely.
Thanks Randy.
I find if I avoid any type of labeling or statement of limitations from others, it allows me to define myself thereby boosting my self esteem
Brian you are absolutely right because you allow yourself to pull free of what other people think about you. That will as you correctly say allow you to define who you are, which in effect will boost your self-esteem.
So glad that you are boosting your self-esteem. I try and do this every once in a while when I get a compliment and keep it at the forefront of my mind. A pick me up for a gloomy day or when I am feeling sad.
Me too Maria... so glad you try to boost your self-esteem. Not always easy to do when life hands out so much. Glad we touched base today - loved it.
You're welcome.