"Trust wasn’t something I was given growing up, especially not knowing I was born with a disability. But when handled with care and understanding, a parent’s approach can lay the foundation a child needs to grow and develop with confidence.

Children need to know they can trust. Knowing that my mental and emotional wellbeing was being addressed would have been a start. Trust would have taken away the fear of the unknown, with all the symptoms and uncertainties that came with what I later learned was a disability.

Trust brings certainty, it's a practice of faith. Trust is what we carry. It takes time to build on trust, seconds to shatter. It’s the backbone of all relationships – it’s a bond that parents need to nurture for their children. Trust helps to form healthy relationship attachments moving forward. It helps children grow to become confident adults.

Trust in a relationship between a parent and child is one that nurtures the emotional, social and physical development of that child. With trust I would have lived with my disability, rather than just barely function."

Ilana Estelle is a mental health and wellbeing advocate who combines educational insight with her personal experience of living with physical, mental, and emotional disabilities. She holds diplomas in Counselling, Diet and Nutrition, Nutritional Therapy, Psychotherapy and Counselling, and Stress Management. Through her writing, Ilana supports others in navigating their emotional, mental, and physical health challenges. In addition to writing for The CP Diary, her work has appeared in healthy lifestyle magazines. Ilana is also the author of three books: Cerebral Palsy: A Story – Finding the Calm After the Storm, Spirituality, Healing and Me, and Survival: The Covid Years – Time for Change.

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4 comments on “Building Trust”

  1. Trust isn't something that I grew up with either, I was brainwashed into believing whatever lies my parents told me, so it's no wonder that I was always confused.

    It also explains why I have ended up being in so many toxic relationships when I should have known better and that only reinforces my ideas about 'you live what you know.'

    I have watched too many people end up doing the same thing over the years. I'm glad I was able to figure it out. The only one I was able to trust in the end was myself.

    I have to work on learning who to trust and remembering that I don't have to suffer like that anymore.

    1. You're in control Randy. As the adult you get to choose. You have the understanding and now that you have the understanding you can put it into practice.

      Whatever our life or our experiences, there comes a time when we must all build on trust and bring those we think we can trust into our circle. It's particularly important if it's not something we've had.

      Not to can leave us struggling to function.

  2. Trust is something I have to feel from within. I shouldn't have to think about it, I should just feel it. I certainly will not fool myself.

    The fact is, trust is not staring me in the face right now.

    1. I'm so sorry to hear that Tim. You're absolutely right though, if we're having to think about trust, there is no trust.

      From a small age, we know the people we can trust. I think we all have to do more to bring and keep trust in our relationships.

      The sad reality is that what we see in society and what's out there in the world in terms of trust, is beginning to spill over into our every day lives.

      We all must do more to come together.

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