Better days

Date 1 August 2013
Author Ilana Estelle
I have to say I’ve had better days and this doesn’t seem to be one of them. I’m struggling with most things today. I just can’t think straight; I’ve had so much going on in the last week. Since my father passed we’re in a different place now because of…
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Issues around control

Date 31 July 2013
Author Ilana Estelle
When we fail to search within ourselves for the answers to some of the issues we have, we may find ourselves stressed. Searching within ourselves can make a difference between a life that just moves us along without us having control, or a life that leaves us happier because we…
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The art of self-compassion

Date 29 July 2013
Author Ilana Estelle
When I look back at my childhood it’s not difficult to see why I was angry. Living with a disability I didn’t know I had, with no choices and having played no part in my decisions, I went on to live with guilt for many years, thinking I could and…
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The next few days

Date 26 July 2013
Author Ilana Estelle
Today I’m going in as a day patient to my local hospital for minor surgery. Nothing serious and I’m not worried. I’d like to add one or two quotes to the feature page in the meantime and will also include a link to Jesse Ramos’ site, someone who also deals…
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Using Empathy and Sympathy

Date 25 July 2013
Author Ilana Estelle
Empathy and sympathy are closely related, but both have different connotations. Empathy is about feeling what someone else feels, whilst sympathy is about action. When you meet someone with empathy it isn’t difficult to see they are sympathetic too. Someone who is sympathetic but not ...
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What keeps us stuck

Date 22 July 2013
Author Ilana Estelle
As we journey through life, we may accumulate various behaviour patterns that can keep us permanently stuck, as those patterns continue to impact our lives. As a child it wasn’t something I was consciously aware of. I also didn’t have enough understanding around my circumstances to give me a clear…
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Out of sorts

Date 20 July 2013
Author Ilana Estelle
With cerebral palsy, my confidence takes a knock in the summer months. With years of having to conform to the summer months with a physical disability, I always struggle this time of year. Summer shoes and summer clothes highlight my struggles. The winter months don’t get to me in the…
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Relationship mistakes

Date 16 July 2013
Author Ilana Estelle
When we look back through the generations, starting with our generation, our parents’ generation and their parents’ generation, we often see patterns forming in those relationships. Relationship mistakes When one partner is more committed and puts more time and effort into making the relationship work and the other doesn’t ...
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A small world

Date 14 July 2013
Author Ilana Estelle
It’s a small world. Having gone to the doctor last week for a routine blood test with the practice nurse, we made light conversation that turned to us talking about cerebral palsy. It turns out that her daughter was 13 weeks premature and although she wasn’t born with cerebral palsy,…
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Don't be a scapegoat

Date 12 July 2013
Author Ilana Estelle
Don't be the scapegoat for something you didn’t do, but if you have done something, then be responsible and accept that you have. Never accept blame for something you didn’t do. Accusations are unjust. Don't be a scapegoat If more than one person is responsible for something that has happened…
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Control and its impact

Date 11 July 2013
Author Ilana Estelle
When a person directly controls your reality without giving you an opportunity to say how you want things to be that person is controlling. If you’re unfortunate to have been brought up with a parent who initiates controlling behaviour that parent will probably continue to control your life long after…
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Find the words

Date 7 July 2013
Author Ilana Estelle
No matter how hard it is to tell your child that you’re struggling with something they’re dealing with, if you can find the words to explain your feelings, you should always let them know. Although children often have to adjust to their circumstances, it’s often more difficult for them to…
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