Personality traits will always be made up of facets that make up who we are, but it depends on what those facets are.

For example, it’s okay for the person who is easy to talk to because that works well, but what about someone who is spiteful and selfish and who has a propensity for lying to avoid responsibility?

Even though personalities cannot be fully changed and personalities encompass the actions and decisions we make, it is possible to change certain aspects of our personality. By us taking steps to actively change ourselves, we become more balanced individuals. Understanding your personality traits better, allows you to make our journey towards self-discovery.

When you learn to give of your best and others benefit, you may become better people. Where some of your personality traits are characteristically brought about through family, it is important to mould into the possible best version of yourselves.

It is possible to change. It is important to challenge your thinking so that with positivity, you can change certain elements of yourselves.

Ilana Estelle is a mental health and wellbeing advocate who combines educational insight with her personal experience of living with physical, mental, and emotional disabilities. She holds diplomas in Counselling, Diet and Nutrition, Nutritional Therapy, Psychotherapy and Counselling, and Stress Management. Through her writing, Ilana supports others in navigating their emotional, mental, and physical health challenges. In addition to writing for The CP Diary, her work has appeared in healthy lifestyle magazines. Ilana is also the author of three books: Cerebral Palsy: A Story – Finding the Calm After the Storm, Spirituality, Healing and Me, and Survival: The Covid Years – Time for Change.

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4 comments on “Changing ourselves”

  1. Many of the facets of my personality were forced upon me and it has been a daily struggle trying to change those which plague me the most.

    I have been called selfish and have been told I only think of myself, when I have been anything but. It just irritates no end, seeing as I have tried so very hard to be a nice guy.

    In reality I have been trying to help the same kind of people like my parents who never seemed to acknowledge or appreciate anything I ever did for them.

    The reality is that I can only change myself and my behaviors, I can't expect others to behave any differently than they always have.

    I have to remember to focus on working on myself and just let them be who they're going to be without getting dragged down with their bad behaviors.

    1. Thanks Randy. Yes, as you say you can only focus on working on yourself. Others must focus on their personalities and how they behave.

      As you know from your own experience with your parents, and as I know too, repeated patterns from our parents, potentially must be unlearned and learned differently by us.

      But whatever it is that we've had to deal with, or continue to deal with, if our behaviour isn't right, it is worth remembering we can all change certain aspects of our personalities.

  2. On the one hand we must live our lives, but on the other we should change for others and our motivation for doing so should be to help others, to make their lives better.

    If do try this, we find that every step we make in that direction makes our own lives much better as well.

    But we must change for the right reasons and not as I have experienced, change to be seen to fit in. No good comes from that.

    1. Thanks. As 'my story' continues to show, we must change to make ourselves better and stronger. No matter the childhood, I believe none of us will escape problems or issues.

      But we must want to change for ourselves and that's key, not to fit into someone else's life. As for the other person, they equally must want to change.

      Society, our communities and the world is relying on it. It's clear we're not getting this right.

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