When emotional events are unprocessed in childhood, then viewed through an adult lens, they may always be seen from a child’s perspective. In other words, as long as those emotional events remain unprocessed, they will stay unprocessed.
It is important to deal with all experiences in childhood so that as you grow, you understand your experiences enough to change the way you see that experience. The idea is that you while you stay true to your values, you also try to change the perspective of that experience.
Dealing with Childhood Emotional Experiences
Processing emotional experiences in childhood is essential, as unresolved feelings can resurface unexpectedly in adulthood. A simple moment – like hearing a song on the radio can trigger a past memory, bringing back the emotions you felt at the time. Similarly, low points in life often uncover emotions we have yet to process, reinforcing the importance of addressing them as they arise.
Unprocessed Emotions
Also, experiences in our early years bring up a lot of unprocessed emotions that we won't always know were harbouring. They're there, it's important we acknowledge them. Emotional responses will always feel daunting until such a time we emotionally work through them and we must.
Understanding Shifts our Perceptions
When we come to understand why an event or experience happens, it’s easier for us to accept it and move on. It is our understanding of something that shifts our perceptions that puts us into a much healthier place. But we should have an open-mind otherwise our thoughts can remain locked.
Any unprocessed emotional event from our past that we don't deal with will always be part of our present. The irony is most of us emotionally live in the past with experiences that we have failed to process, but physically live in the present.
That is pretty much what I have. A whole childhood of unprocessed emotional events, so it's no wonder I have such a hard time staying in the present.
Chronologically I may be 50 years old, but mentally I'm still trapped in the past and think like a child of 11 or 12 years old at best. That's when I started partying. I tried very hard to escape from the realities of my life by drinking and drugging, but it only made things worse in the long-run.
If it wasn't that it was getting involved in toxic relationships, which has been my biggest downfall. I have wasted far too much time focusing on other people's issues, so now I need to focus on me and not worry about others, who don't give a damn about me or my life.
Thanks Randy. Yes, I get that. I've also had that. I was carrying too many issues. It is what prompted me to find out about my disability. Where others don't have our back it's important we do what's best for us.
Sadly, all unprocessed issues will present in later life. No one is free of avoiding them. In time, unaddressed issues will simply get bigger and more distorted, as we become more bitter.
Although it's not always easy to work through our issues from childhood, I believe it's something we should all do.