Unresolved trauma doesn’t just disappear. Instead, it gets carried from one generation to the next. It can surface in many ways, including anger, self-destructive tendencies, depression, anxiety, and low self-esteem. These patterns often repeat until they are acknowledged, understood, and healed.
How Trauma Works
Trauma travels through family lines – until someone is ready to heal it. Being able to identify symptoms of trauma will differ, based on those affected and how each individual presents.
Psychology Trends
Trends in psychotherapy are beginning to look beyond the trauma of an individual, to include traumatic events in families and social history, as part of the bigger picture. Legacies are usually passed on through unconscious conditioning, through messages that pass between an adult and child.
Parents Failing to Deal with their Issues
Where parents fail to deal with their issues, their issues often become part of their children's lives and their future relationships. Any issues passed down always form part of the bigger picture, whilst those issues are not being addressed.
Instead, when we deal with our issues and understand our lives more, we can make new choices to change how we see the world and each other. It is important to come to understand the patterns of trauma and how trauma works.
I can testify to this. I have no relationship with cousins now because of unresolved issues my parents had with their own siblings. This is a shame as it is completely unnecessary but not at all uncommon.
I would always try and address these family complications before they get to grow into issues which can become irreconcilable.
Thanks. Yes, and as you say it is completely unnecessary. 'We're a long time dead' as they say. What's the point?
When we get to close the coffin lid on a loved one, it's easy for us to ask the question, why? But it's completely futile when families fall out and simply choose not to do something about it out of pride.