Different Doesn't Mean Less: Learning to Embrace My Uniqueness

"I was born different. It's taken me time to come to terms with that. I'm still learning to embrace my uniqueness –  and that's okay." Ilana Estelle

Growing up, I often felt defined by what made me different. Over time, I've realised that while many people share a diagnosis, no two people experience disability in the same way. We all have our own strengths, challenges, personalities, and stories.

Too often, disability is seen before individuality. Society still has a long way to go to look beyond a diagnosis, difference and to recognise the person first. We are more than our disabilities, yet society sees difference first over ability, strength, and personality.

For many years, I struggled with knowing I was somehow different. Like many people living with what I later learned was a disability, I tried to fit into a world that didn't fit me. There were times when comparisons made it even harder to recognise my own identity. But disability doesn't define my worth. I don't need to fit into the world; I need to fit into myself. My uniqueness is something to embrace, not something I need to apologise for or hide from.

Learning to accept my own differences has taught me to be more patient and understanding of others. We all experience life differently, and we don't always know what someone else is going through. Some people need a little more time and shouldn't be judged for being slow. We all deserve the chance to be understood rather than misunderstood.

Taking the time to listen, rather than judge, can make a world of difference.

Writing has become part of that journey. It gives me a way to make sense of my experiences, to reflect on what I've learned, and to share my perspective with others. I don't write because I have all the answers. I write because every story has the power to help someone feel seen, understood, or a little less alone.

Accepting myself has been one of the greatest gifts I've ever given myself. I don't expect everyone to fully understand me or my nuances, but I hope they'll take the time to see me as a person first.

At the end of the day, we're all more than the labels placed upon us. Every person has a story, and every person deserves to be seen for who they are. I think that's where understanding begins.

Ilana Estelle is a mental health and wellbeing advocate who combines educational insight with her personal experience of living with physical, mental, and emotional disabilities. She holds diplomas in Counselling, Diet and Nutrition, Nutritional Therapy, Psychotherapy and Counselling, and Stress Management. Through her writing, Ilana supports others in navigating their emotional, mental, and physical health challenges. In addition to writing for The CP Diary, her work has appeared in healthy lifestyle magazines. Ilana is also the author of three books: Cerebral Palsy: A Story – Finding the Calm After the Storm, Spirituality, Healing and Me, and Survival: The Covid Years – Time for Change.

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