Unless we constantly work through the implications of some of our decisions, we will end up making the wrong ones.
I spent a lot of my early years observing, so by the time I got to be the adult I had a clearer understanding of how to go about my life, even though I hadn’t personally made any decisions. There will always be consequences for every decision we make. That should always be our reference point.
Unfortunately, when we go on to make bad decisions, there is usually a ripple effect that involves other people, therefore we should weigh up the pros and cons on the decisions we make before making a final decision. It's always harder to go back in when a bad decision has been made, than it is to take time to make the right decision in the first place.
When we fail to work through the process and that is what it is; when we make decisions without first working through the process, we will end up with decisions we’re often not prepared for. I know that when I come to look at the whole picture, making the right decision for me is child's play.
Yes, I've always based my decisions on what was best for others rather than what the right decision was for me!
This led me to making many wrong decisions, which cost me more than I could have ever imagined. I'm sure people think that I made a lot of these choices intentionally, without knowing my history and what I have been through.
I have been ashamed of what I had done in the past when I didn't know it was okay to stand up for myself. Most people grow up being allowed to make their own decisions when I was never really allowed to, under the threat of severe mental torture!
I have to let go of the resentments that I have been carrying for so long so that I can move on with my life. There isn't anything I can do to change the past as much as I would wish to.
It's a totally new concept for me that I can make the decisions that are right for me and not have to appease everyone else at the expense of my own well-being. There is actually a big difference between being selfish and taking care of one's own needs first.
I can't afford to feel guilty at this point of taking care of myself, since if I don't do that I won't be available, to be able to help anyone else!
Thanks Randy. I couldn't agree more.
Your response resonates with me because being a pleasing child that's exactly what I did, but agree looking after and taking care of ourselves, making the decisions that are right for us, is exactly what we need to do.
Without looking after ourselves we can't help look after others and will probably be ill-equipped to make our own decisions, let alone make sure the decisions we go on to make are right.
It's important we all learn to make decisions and make sure they're right and not feel guilty about making them.
I agree. A greater understanding helps us make the right decisions.
I also believe that sometimes we have to make the wrong decisions and work through the consequences, in order to help us make right decisions in the future.
Thank you. I think there is some truth in what you say.
As long as out thoughts continue to go into our decisions, there is little reason why we would make the wrong decisions; unless of course we're struggling with our understanding of some of the decisions we have to make.
That said, making the wrong decisions helps the growth process, as long as we take lessons from those wrong decisions.