Still very much in the throes of the pandemic and two and a half years later, I felt confident enough to go back to a supermarket. This is a milestone for me.
Last Sunday, armed with a mask and visor and feeling okay about it, I went back in. With autism and anxiety, it's always a big ask, I can't just tell myself to do something, it has to feel right, I have to feel comfortable with the idea, it's just how that works.
On Sunday I managed it. I feel as though it is a turning point in my mental health journey. I am now confident enough to go out with a mask and visor and to feel comfortable and safe.
Mental health issues are difficult. For those who are following my blog and who deal with mental health issues themselves, they will very much understand what this milestone means.
I shudder at how long it has taken, but then I reconcile that if the pandemic had been handled sensitively by the UK government and they didn’t rule by fear, I like many, may have got into something resembling normal life a little quicker.
In two and a half years, it is difficult to believe this is what I have lived through. The irony is that through my writing I am self-assured, it is the circumstances I have struggled with.
Don't under-estimate how big an achievement this visit was for you. It wasn't just a trip to a supermarket, but with autism, it was a massive step in coping with the impact of the removal of all restrictions by the UK government.
Hopefully you can now feel strong enough to do others things also.
Thank you. You're right. I hope that can continue. Anyone who deals with autism will know how mentally challenging life is, in the pandemic.
I am self-assured, I know who I am and that feels good. My writing continues to excite and inspire me to want and do better, but the mental challenges I have to cope with through autism, can leave me scared, anxious and stuck.
And the pattern repeats. When I am able to normalise situations, and I have to rely on others to do that, I am back to being self-assured again.