It is important to be aware of your feelings, to never lose sight of how you feel. Also to never allow another person's version of what you feel, get the better of you.

If you went through years of feeling guilty for the things you didn't achieve, now it a good time to change. It's never easy living with other people's decisions, even harder when their decisions are the reason you failed to achieve.

If those same people are unable to take responsibility and instead continue to play the blame game, turning every discussion about how you feel about what you haven't achieved, into an argument, then it could be time to think about a different path.

Life is too short to spend your time with people who do very little for you, except leave you with more stress and who think you are the problem!

Ilana Estelle is a mental health and wellbeing advocate who combines educational insight with her personal experience of living with physical, mental, and emotional disabilities. She holds diplomas in Counselling, Diet and Nutrition, Nutritional Therapy, Psychotherapy and Counselling, and Stress Management. Through her writing, Ilana supports others in navigating their emotional, mental, and physical health challenges. In addition to writing for The CP Diary, her work has appeared in healthy lifestyle magazines. Ilana is also the author of three books: Cerebral Palsy: A Story – Finding the Calm After the Storm, Spirituality, Healing and Me, and Survival: The Covid Years – Time for Change.

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4 comments on “Now is the time for change”

  1. Yes, it is definitely time for change, even though it isn't something I'm very good at dealing with. I have wasted far too many years carrying the mountain of guilt that my parents dumped on me.

    Neither one of them took any responsibility for our horrible childhood and now both of them are finally gone, so I feel like I'm free to speak my mind.

    It now makes so much sense as to why I haven't been able to leave my current relationship, seeing as she pretty much treats me the same way my mother did and makes me feel just as useless. She has actually said that I only think of myself and has blamed so much on me when those things weren't my fault.

    It would be great if I could either be with someone who actually likes me, or even on my own which may happen but I know that I will survive!

  2. Your last paragraph is precisely what I've been thinking lately. That change is not only inevitable but necessary.

    You are quite a problem solver.

    1. Thanks Tim. Yes, it's never too late for change but change is often too late for us when we choose to ignore change.

      No worries. Happy to help.

    2. Thanks Randy. Yes, only you can make the decision of course, but if it were me, I'd rather be by myself than live with someone who makes me feel 'useless.'

      No one should have to put up with it.

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