We’re born into a culture that society and our parents expect us to conform to and with all cultures there are rules, it doesn’t matter the culture.

I understand it all too well, when it becomes the norm not to take personal responsibility because our culture takes precedent over our lives. In the short term it seems easier to live our lives that way, but in the longer term, it becomes much harder, unless you're happy to conform.

For some of us, it doesn't matter what we do, there is always an unspoken word, a realization on our part that we're expected to conform whether we agree or not. It makes sense that the more we come to rely on culture, the less control we will have in other areas of our lives.

As we begin and continue to live our lives around the culture we’re born into, we stop making room for our own beliefs and the way we see and want to live our own lives.

Ilana Estelle is a mental health and wellbeing advocate who combines educational insight with her personal experience of living with physical, mental, and emotional disabilities. She holds diplomas in Counselling, Diet and Nutrition, Nutritional Therapy, Psychotherapy and Counselling, and Stress Management. Through her writing, Ilana supports others in navigating their emotional, mental, and physical health challenges. In addition to writing for The CP Diary, her work has appeared in healthy lifestyle magazines. Ilana is also the author of three books: Cerebral Palsy: A Story – Finding the Calm After the Storm, Spirituality, Healing and Me, and Survival: The Covid Years – Time for Change.

Most people who read this blog

went on to read these blogs next
Date 20 July 2026
Author Ilana Estelle

The Power to Choose

Breaking free from expectations and embracing a life shaped by your own values Empowerment starts when we try something new. It's about taking action and believing that our choices can shape our lives. Many of ...
Read more
Date 16 July 2026
Author Ilana Estelle

Britain's Next Prime Minister

As Keir Starmer leaves office, attention turns to the challenges awaiting his successor Keir Starmer leaves office having described it as a privilege to serve as Prime Minister. Those words are worth reflecting on. Politics was once ...
Read more
Date 14 July 2026
Author Ilana Estelle

The Soul's Continuing Journey

How our choices, relationships, and experiences become part of the soul's continuing journey. My understanding of death is this: the greatest misunderstanding is believing that life ends. The physical body reaches its ...
Read more
1 2 3 521

6 comments on “Our cultural lives”

  1. I was born into a culture that believes in family and love. I don't think I ever bucked the system.

    I rebelled against my parents for a short time but not the culture. I had a good life and still do when it comes to family and the love of family. I have a great support system. I understand about some other cultures and I wouldn't want to be told I had to conform if I was to have the support of a family in that culture.

    I think we should have free will and the choice to choose how we want to live our lives.

    1. Thanks Lisa.

      Culture is defined as the ideals, customs, and social behaviour and interaction of a particular people or society. It helps if as part of those ideals we have the support of a loving family. I am so pleased you had support Lisa.

      The problem I see with culture is that it dictates how we live our lives. Sometimes when we conform to our cultures, other things go by the wayside including support.

  2. Lisa's last sentence says it all for me. Cultural beliefs should be of our making and not someone else's.

    1. That is the way culture should work, but unfortunately that is not how it works! I agree with both you and Lisa. Thanks.

  3. Most of the problems in the world stem from people wanting everyone else to live the same way they do and hating everyone who chooses to live differently!

    My mother eventually brainwashed me enough so that I would conform to her wants and I hated every minute of it. It has taken me a very long to realize that it's OK for me to live my own life the way I want to. I don't have to conform with living the way others expect me to even if others don't like it.

    I just want to be able to live my life without feeling guilty for even breathing!

    1. Thanks Randy. I agree with you. Your first sentence resonates with my greatly. I know my father didn't like that I chose to live my life differently, because it meant him having to conform to my ways, which meant we didn't agree on things including my culture. I wasn't a yes girl anymore.

      I believe it's very much OK for you to live your life your own way. Looking back on my own life and how I changed, I would still do the same again if I had my life over.

      Regardless of culture, I believe lives are for us to live the way we choose. There is too much angst in the world, because we're expected to conform.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Subscribe to receive regular updates

Enter your details below to be the first to receive updates on new articles on my blog.